𝘾𝙀𝙊. - 𝘾𝙀𝙊 𝙓 𝙍𝙀𝘼𝘿𝙀𝙍

24.

━━━

"Do you understand what I'm trying to say?"

 Silence.

"Y/N?"

Silence.

"Y/N."

My heart finds its footing, and slowly but surely begins to pump life through my body and clarity across my inebriated mind.

My eyes flutter upwards, my cheeks tainted with the reminder of my emotions painting my features, exposing my inner turmoil.

He tilts his head.

Amused.

I cannot bring myself to speak. 

I don't want to think.

Or feel.

Because right now, I feel every single feeling, like a tasting palette forced down my throat to consume the entire variety.

The air is thick.

I need to remind myself to breathe, but when I do, my inhalation draws in a shudder.

I've thought of scenarios like this so many times, so many nights with our hotel rooms only separated by a wall, so close, yet so far away.

Yet, now that he's invaded my space, torn that wall down and brought his own feelings to challenge mine, I suddenly have no clue as to the processing measures of this situation.

I don't know whether I want to cry, throw up, sleep, or kiss him. 

All of it whirls within my mind, speaking all at once, demanding action. 

But I don't move.

"...I...I-I don't- I don't know what to d...do-"

"You don't have to do anything. You don't have to move a singular muscle."

My gaze fixes on his. He catches mine, so intensely, I feel myself mentally back down.

I'm speechless once more. I feel as though I need permission to speak; some sort of guidance, because I've never been so utterly terrified of my own bodily reactions before in my life.

I don't know why I can't breathe naturally, or why my cheeks have blossomed into the hue of scarlet roses, or why my stomach has confused the alcohol for the butterflies.

Maybe it's a simple mix of everything, but that scares me more. 

"You're flustered... is it because I told you I wish to look at you in the way's I want to? or because I loathe not being able to?" 

He cocks his head, a faint smirk playing upon his lips in a way that defines his cheekbones in the most attractive form, and it feels like everything he does oozes of an allure that I simply cannot process in real time.

It's the type of feeling that I know I'll think about for nights on end.

"...B...both- all- all of it-" I blurt within a shaken whisper, my eyes refusing to meet his within a concoction of shame and attracted embarrassment, and the scent of his rich cologne is not supporting my case whatsoever.

He hums in soft amusement to himself, clicking his tongue against the roof of his mouth. 

"I cannot deny that I don't feel the same... although it paints quite the pretty picture for you,"

He insinuates to my heated face, and I feel my body slam with another wave of warm dizziness, taking a short breather as my lids bat downwards quickly.