01.12.2014
Im trying to be good and kind and trying to don't offend people I love. But all I say hurts them. I have no intention of saying anything offensive, but I always do it. For me there is nothing in these words, neither good or bad. But I feeling like I am a lusifer like evil like the worst person on earth. How to stop it? I try to watch my words, I try to be nice, but at the last moment I ruin everything. I don't want to feel that way. I don't want to be a satan.
01.26.2014
I hate myself again. it's so difficult. I limit myself in food, I cut myself, I do all this as punishment for hurting others. It's so terrible that they continue to love me. after everything I said. I don't want this so much, I hate it with all my soul.
01.30.2014
I thought again that everything was fine, but it wasn't. I hurt others again, but for this I hurt myself. At least it makes me happy that I got what I deserved, but it saddens me that these people don't know about it. I think I'm not trying hard enough. I have to watch every word and every letter that comes out of my mouth. I love them, but they shouldn't love me
