𝐎𝐯𝐞𝐫 '𝐧 𝐨𝐮𝐭 - The Walking Dead Fanfic

𝐀𝐰𝐚𝐤𝐞𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐠

In a midst of chaos, there is always an opportunity. - Sun Tzu

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𝟐𝟎𝟑𝟑

Guilt. Guilt is a void that's impossible to evade. You can't turn away from the darkness, especially in an isolated global apocalypse. People turn against each other, begging for help or mercy that rarely ever comes. Losing people becomes the norm. Family, friends, all vanish.

More then half of the population was wiped out in the span of a few years. No police, no firefighters, no government, no hope. Just a world stripped of order, folding into a brutal battle for survival.

No one is 100% sure how the virus started; people have theories. One suggests it was divine retribution or evolution. There's the bio-weapon theory, the natural origin idea, and even a French connection. Some theories make sense, but ultimately, everything fell apart one by one. No cure, only survival.

I lost my parents and took over caring for my sister, Paige, when I was only 13 and she was 3. That was almost a decade ago. Now, I'm older and a single mother of a girl. She isn't even mine—Mae. I took her in after her parents, Jane and Ronnie, died. Jane was bitten before Mae was born, but thankfully, Mae was fine and born a little early. Ronnie died young from lung cancer.

I knew Ronnie well, but I can't say the same about Jade. I took Mae in out of guilt, knowing I had tried to kill Ronnie because if I didn't, I would have lost the only family I had left. I wanted Ronnie to at least know he had someone to turn to, like me and Carl.

I was taken captive and sold off to the Claimers by a woman named Jackie for drugs and whatnot. I was only 14. She turned out to be Negan Smith's wife, who also happened to be Ronnie's father. I didn't know Ronnie at the time. I certainly didn't have faith in him when I did. His dad killed two people I knew and trusted.

But Carl was my friend, almost like a brother. I met him when his father's group saved me from the Claimers. I didn't even realize I needed saving. Years of abuse had worn me down. The Claimers believed that sexual violence was a way to gain control. I was manipulated, used, and shattered—not just for leaving them, but for not leaving sooner. I was a child who was looking after a 4 year old. It was more than I could manage.

Carl saved me both physically and mentally, and I'll always be grateful for that—especially at the start when no one else would. Yet, despite everything he did for me, I couldn't save him. I'll never forgive myself for that.

Ronnie died when Mae was around three. I took her in. The only thing I have to show for Mae is a photo of me, Ronnie, and Carl from when we were younger. Even that, I keep out of her reach.

Beverly was another important person. We were friends since I was 8. I lost her when the outbreak started and again when I was 17, in Alexandria. It was pure luck that I survived that time. I lost her a third time after The Wolves attacked Alexandria.

Now the girls are 16. It hurts to see them grow up in a world like this. Instead of learning how to ride a bike like a normal kid, they're learning how to aim guns and make sure they hit the brain when killing those things.

Every day, we grapple with the loss of what should have been her childhood. But as long as she can survive, there's a part of me that holds onto hope—hope that maybe, somehow, she'll find a piece of normalcy amidst the chaos. Which I know for a fact will never happen.