False Start

part two of episode three

authors note: mentions of death grief, finding wills "body" stacey and jonathon make up for good this time, not much steve in this chapter i promise later in the chapters ya'll will get some stacey and steve interaction but i love the slow burn couples so the wait will be worth it! 

"I..." "And Nancy..." you pull away so that he's no longer touching you. "That was a line I never thought you would cross. And to lie to me about it, I just... why?" Jonathan shakes his head, a few tears of his own now beginning to fall. "I don't know." There's nothing else you can say; you've drained all your energy. A headache is beginning to form and with the parking lot clearing out, indicating the end of the school day, you know you need to leave for work soon. Normally when you look at Jonathan, you feel a sense of security, but now all you feel is dread. His shoulders are hunched, the bags under his eyes darker than ever, and at this moment you're not sure you know who he is anymore. It terrifies the shit out of you. "I should go," you wipe your nose with your sleeve, side stepping Jonathan as you start walking towards the bike stand. "You're leaving?" There's fear in his voice, and you can hear the undertones of are you leaving me, too? "I have to work tonight, so I need to- go im covering for your mom still- "Let me drive you then, it's cold and-and we can talk more about this-"

He follows you to your bike and you feel such pity for him. You know he's right about needing to talk more, but all you want right now is to crawl into bed and pretend that this whole week has been a dream. A horrible, awful dream. You offer Jonathan your hand, the cut on your finger no longer bleeding, and intertwine your fingers with his. "I want to be alone right now, okay? Please, just give me some time." He wants to argue with you, you can see it in his eyes, but just like you know him better than anyone else, he knows you just as well. He knows there's no use trying to change your mind when you get like this; when the feelings become too much and solitude is your only solution. It's happened before in the past, but never with him. All he can do is wait for you to come back when you're ready. "Okay, I can do that." You squeeze his hand, like you always do, before you let go and bike away.

He watches as you leave.

Tonight's shift is another slow one, which you're grateful for so you spent most of your shift stocking and ringing up some of the costumers that came in.

It was just last week that Jonathan had been driving you, Will, and Dustin to school. You'd been singing some song on the radio and the November air had a slight nostalgia of August warmth. Will and Dustin complained about your singing as you wailed on, Jonathan eventually joining in so that the two younger boys could only cover their ears with their hands and groan in annoyance.

Now Will is gone, taking the August warmth with him and leaving behind only November cold that leaves your bones feeling raw.

The laughter is gone, and now you're afraid that your best friend is gone as well.

You come home to an empty house, a note on the kitchen counter informing you that your mother is at her knitting club and that Dustin is off with his friends.

Wonderful. Your brother has once again gone off on some adventure without informing you first. What a lovely addition to your already horrible day.

You call the Wheeler's first, hoping that maybe you don't have to bike around the entire town to find the little shit, but like always: you're mistaken.

"I'm sorry, but the boys went out biking right after school."

"Oh, lovely then. Thanks, Mrs. Wheeler, have a good night."

"You too, dear!"

As soon as you hang up, you allow yourself a moment to just scream. The headache that formed during your fight with Jonathan hasn't left, you're tired, you have so much homework that you're too afraid to even look at, and you still have no idea who El is or what she really knows about Will. And now you have to bike all around Hawkins to find said girl, because there's no way the morons have listened to your orders to stay put with her. You check Lucas' house first, but Erica tells you that they aren't there and requests that you inform Lucas that her lying fee has been raised to $5. "That's a bit steep, don't you think?" "Do you wanna pay?" "Good point, have a good night then Erica."