Right where you left me

John got married and Esty got buried, but I'm right where you left me. Sitting in that corner of our restaurant, cross-legged waiting for you. Your ghost sitting next to me, dust collected on our engagement rings that you're holding tight in your closed fists.

Do you remember how we painted our house? Just like your grandparents did... I thought we're happiest couple to ever exist, when you kiss me on a balcony, in summer air.

But I guess I was wrong about our relationship, I used to think that the rumors spread by my enemies and my parents tries to distance us were the problem we fought everyday. However, when we spent a month away from the crowd, alone in the woods, you looked too annoyed with me like my father used to talk to my mother...

When I was a kid, I was led to believe that all the big barbed creatures called men were the same. Because of the one who used to came late everyday, hit my mom to a pulp after spending his whole day drinking with other women.

But when I saw you, I knew that I was wrong, that you're different. You won't leave like my father, you won't run like water, 'cause I'm the only one you love and think about. But you're not that different after all.

I'm still feeling the mascara run, still hearing my hair pin drop when the glass shattered. You didn't even turn to check on me, nor look at the spilled coffee on the floor. You just said that you met someone, and you're gonna take a leave today and never return to your hometown.

You probably have a wife now, and kids to celebrate the Christmas with. But I'm still frozen in time, still at the restaurant, thinking that you can return, that you'll miss our story. I never caused any harm although our love died younger than I can realize or absorb.

Sometimes I wake up in the middle of the night and try to call your old phone number. I know that you'll never hear the hundreds of voicemails I left for you. When I tell you how much I missed you, or recall a very romantic memory we share, or cry my eyes out talking to the unknown.

Maybe you'll never read this letter, but I wanted to send it to your address in hope you would take a look at it. I'm suffering from lungs cancer, just like my grandmother before me. My gentle coughs you used to give me your handkerchief for are now too red. I don't know if I'll live enough to see you again, but I wanted to tell you that if I'm dead while you're reading this letter you know where to find me...

I'll be at our house in the woods, laying in a small scary grave, hoping to meet you in heaven.

_By your very first love_

After 3 weeks, she died... And as she thought he couldn't see her until the funeral... He came every Tuesday to her grave, leaving her favorite white roses and speaking to her buried body the exact same way she used to record those voicemails. After all, they loved each other buy they weren't meant for each other.

Written by #writingforfun