James' POV:
It's a Friday afternoon and Will has invited me to the studio to film. We are going to be filming a reviewing celebrity products video. There is a slight problem though. My anxiety has sky rocketed this morning and doesn't seem to be getting any better. I have tried all my old techniques from when I had bad anxiety as a child, but none of them seem to be working. I worry what Will is going to say if he notices. Will he laugh? Will he brush it off and pretend nothing is happening? We don't really do touchy-feely stuff in our friendship, and I can't imagine he would know what to do if I broke out into a full-blown panic attack. Hopefully, that doesn't happen.
I arrive at the studio and take a deep breath. We are going to be filming for at least two hours so I need to hold myself together. Here goes nothing.
As I step into the studio, I can see Will stood speaking to Mikey. I take another deep breath and plaster a smile on my face. I make my way over to them both, Mikey being the first to notice me.
"Hey, James. Good to see you, mate." Mikey says with a slight nod of the head, making Will turn around quickly.
"You too, lad." I respond feeling even more breathless.
"Will! I've missed you soon much!" I shouted, pushing aside the horrid feeling in my chest.
"Alright lad, tone it down a bit, yeah?" Will said, rolling his eyes playfully.
After a little bit of chit-chat, we decided to start filming. Will and I sat down, and I began to get lost in thought. The anxiety is becoming increasingly difficult to deal with as each second passes. I'm lucky that no one has noticed yet. It's only two hours of filming. Two hours and I can go home. Two hours and I can fall into the comfort of my bed and Otto. All of a sudden, I am pulled out of my daydream.
"-mes, James man," I hear. Will shouting my name suddenly. I jumped slightly, realising I had almost blown my cover. Once again, I take a deep breath and return to the present time.
"W-what?" I whisper.
"You alright, lad? You spaced out for a bit there?"
I look over at Will's face, and he actually looks concerned. He's analysing my facial expression and my body language. I force myself to relax before putting a smile back on my face.
"Yeah, yeah, I'm fine. I'm just a little tired." I laugh lightly, hoping he believes me.
"Alright lad, just try stay focused. Got a video to film here." Will says before facing forward and preparing to start the recording. All I do is nod in response.
It's now an hour after filming, and my throat is beginning to tighten, and my hands are shaken. Will goes to hand me a cup of prime, but I push his hands towards the table and shake my head. He puts the cup down and goes to say something but stops. He immediately looks concerned, causing me to look away and put my head on the table.
"Right everyone pack up, stop recording and go home. We'll finish this another day." Will's words are muffled, but I can just about hear everyone leaving the room.
"Take a deep breath, fella. You're gonna be alright." Will says as he places his hand on my back and rubs it up and down. His touch is comforting but firm.
"C-cant breathe. H-help" I stutter, lifting my head and clawing at my throat.
Will quickly grabs my hands and pulls them away from my throat. He holds my hands in his and locks his eyes with mine.
"Don't hurt yourself, lad. You're gonna be alright. Just follow my breathing and I promise you will be okay soon." Will's voice is comforting me more than I ever thought was possible.
Minutes pass by, and Will continues to use encouraging me. Eventually, my breathing calms, and the air starts entering my deprived body. I begin to realise what just happened. I had just had a panic attack in front of Will. Will who was probably going to cut contact with me after this. Will who means more to me than I ever thought he was.
"Oi, don't be panicking again. We've just got you calmed down, " Will says, slowly letting go of my hands that I forgot he had ahold of.
"Yeah. Sorry." I mutter.
"Don't apologise. What was that about then?" Will says clearly concerned.
"I've been feeling anxious all day. I just didn't want to say anything."
"Why not? We could have postponed the filming, and you wouldn't have had to go through that."
The slight disappointment in Will's voice has me feeling massively shameful. I hadn't meant to disappoint him, I just didn't want to bother him. What a shit show that's been.
"I just didn't think you would care." I say feeling apologetic.
"You daft bastard"
The next thing I know, Will has stood up, and he's pulling me out of my chair and into his embrace. My arms go around his waist, and my head lays on his shoulder. I realise this is what I needed all along. I needed to speak to someone. To speak to Will. Maybe I wouldn't have gotten into this situation in the first place if I had spoken to him.
"Thank you, Will." I say quietly.
"Always fella, always."
