Unless I'm With You

Chapter 12: Cold Love

Anneliese POV

I keep myself shut. I know Mari wants to know what happen between me and Jackson, but I just don't want to talk about it. I locked myself in the bathroom once we arrived at our room. Mari starts to get worried. She keeps on knocking the door and ask me if I am okay. I told her that I need my time alone and ask her not to worry about me. I open the rain shower, and let the water runs to my body. I started to cry once I remember our conversation. I don't know why it is so hard for me to let him know. Why I need to keep this secret on my own? Why is it so hard for me to let it out?

Few hours later, I got off from the bathroom, dry myself and wear my pajama. Mari still awakes, she holds herself from sleeping just to make sure that I am okay. I sit beside the room's windows, and Mari just walk to me and take the empty spot facing me.

"Are you okay?" Rubbing my hand.

"I don't know. I don't know if I can say that I'm okay."

"Can I ask you what happen between you and Jackson?"

I lean my head at the window. "We sort of got into a fight."

"Why? I thought that you both are okay."

"I'm still not ready to tell him everything."

Mari sighed. "It's okay baby, you can take this slowly. Once you are ready, totally ready, just tell him the whole story. Remember that I will always by your side."

"Thank you, Mari." She gives me a tight hug.

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Jackson POV

Why am I so stupid? Why I force her? I shouldn't do that. I don't want to lose her again. Now, we are on our way back home. Everyone is silence, not dare to ask me what just happen. Mark and Youngjae decided to sleep at Yugyeom house tonight as it would be easy for us to go to convention tomorrow. Mark also had park his car outside Yugyeom's house. Once we got home, I went to the guest room where Yugyeom let me sleep. I lie on the bed thinking what I should do, what I should say if I meet Annie tomorrow. It is my fault, I know she doesn't like been force, but I just forget about it. I think I should just wait for tomorrow and see what's going to happen.

Today is the competition day for Taekwondo. It will be held for two days, so me and Mark going to be super busy. I'm going help his team to arrange the contestant based on their category, and Mark will be the referee for sparring competition. Everything need to be according to the schedule given. I don't have the time to see Annie, and she must be busy helping Mari as Muay Thai competition will be held after Taekwondo. These two days will be the only event that we have for the convention, so everyone will attend and give support for the competition.

The event runs smoothly, there is a hassle, but everything is under control. It is my first-time helping Mark and his team, so I learn new things from them. People are enjoyed watching the competition and give support and positive vibe. Everyone from other martial arts too shows their sportsmanship by coming and gives their support for competition. I saw Annie and her team. I saw her, focusing on the sparring competition. With her cold face, or what everyone would call as bitch face, watching the game. She doesn't even talk, or smile. Just focus.

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The competition has ended. As everyone are heading out of the competition place, she is still sitting at the bench, looking, searching for someone. Then she saw me. Our eyes locked. She was there looking for me. She stands up I walk to me.

"Can we talk?"

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Anneliese POV

"Jackson, can we talk?" asked me nervously.

"Sure, give me some time as I need to pack my things and help them clean up."

"Yes, sure. I can wait."

I waited for Jackson about half an hour until he finishes helping the team and pack his stuff. We went to a nearby café and order ice latte for me and ice americano for him. We're both are silence, until the waiter brings our drinks to the table.

"I'm sorry about last night, Annie. I didn't mean too." Jackson starts the conversation.

"Actually, it's my fault too Jackson. You didn't do any wrong." I said.

"Can we just forget what had happen? We start a new one?" Jackson suggests.

"Yes, sure. Can I start first?" I asked.

"Sure, ladies first."

I took a deep breath. "I want to apologize for what I had done to you. I know I hurt you so much, I've been selfish. I'm not supposed to leave you" He shushed me.

"Annie, it's okay. What past is past. As much as I want to know the reason behind it, I don't want to force you anymore. I know you are not ready to tell me, I can wait. For me now, I have found you. That is enough for me." I start to sobs. At last, all the burden and feeling that I felt, gone.

"Jackie, I, I miss you so much. I do."

"Annie, my heart, only you. How much that I miss you, until now. I never stop missing you, loving you." He is sobbing.

I cupped his face, wiping his tears away, caressing his cheek, and he holds it and kiss my palm. "Can we just go back like we used to be Annie?" I got paused for a moment, think what I should say.

"Jackie, we're both changed, we have our own life now.

"I know, but we can start again."

"It's not about we can or cannot, it just that we need to take things slow."

He put my hands down. I can see that he disappointed. As for now I have other things that I need to think about. I don't want to rush. I want to be ready; I want him to know my real situation, what I need to deal with, and also, Jayden. He doesn't know about Jayden yet. What would he think once he knows about Jayden. I hold his hand, wanting him to look at me.

"I want you to understand my situation Jackie, we just meet again after 5 years. As of now, we are like two strangers." I try to make him understand.

"Then, can we start back as a friend? Try to know each other's back, try to catch up with each other's life?"

"Well, we can try, but I don't want you to have high hopes on me."

"I won't. You can trust me on that." He smiles. Seeing that smile, the smiles that always melted my heart.

We continue our conversation by sharing what we did for the past 5 years, about our experience, the team, we even throwback to our time together. We get to laughed about all the silly and dumbest thing that we did. As time goes by, it is time for us to go back. He offered to send me back to hotel and I accept it. Walking back while I'm holding his arm, like the old time. As we arrived at the hotel, we bid a goodbye with a hug, without realizing that he had hold my face and kiss my forehead. I got stun and speechless. I did not expect that he would do that. He knows what he was doing, and he just run while laughing and waving at me. I don't even get the chance to scold him for what he did.