Out Of Darkness

Chapter Nine

Aleksei.

Upon returning home, I banged the front door shut and darted into the kitchen searching for something cold to drink. I was furious. Her fucking husband is beating her and she is allowing it. I was seething when I left her office. Angry at her for allowing herself to be hurt like that repeatedly and angry at myself for caring so much about someone I barely know. I have come to understand after interacting with her that she's far from the image she projects to those around her. Multiple layers lie beneath her surface, ready to be discovered. I find this whole situation really baffling. I'm going crazy over a married woman who has made it abundantly clear on several occasions that she wants nothing to do with me. What compels me to push myself into her life? What motivates me to continue liking her even more when I realize it could result in heartache down the line? This is utterly ridiculous. My mother would take great pleasure in analyzing my thoughts if she ever learned the truth. I need to regroup my thoughts and think of what I'll do.

I enjoyed a soothing sip as I made my way to the back door where I heard voices. In the pool, my parents let loose, engaging in laughter and playful antics. You would think at this age they would tone down, but Jesus Christ I swear they go at it few times a day. Their love for each other is unmistakably strong. That woman is essential to my father's well-being.

My father had an affair with a defiant soldier, and I was the consequence of that relationship. Because regulations forbade ranking officers from forming relationships with their subordinates, my father was suspended for three months. My mother however was forced out of the military. She didn't want me. She handed me over to my father just weeks after my birth, including a birth certificate and all necessary paperwork conferring custody solely to him. When I was younger, I resembled him perfectly; a DNA test seemed unnecessary since anyone could tell I was my father's son.  Our eyes were both clear as the sky. Facing unexpected challenges, my father did everything possible.

I won’t claim it was easy to be raised alone by him during the first five years of my life. Even without a clear plan, he evolved and nurtured me in the best way he understood how. He often mentioned that when he laid eyes on me, I instantly became his best friend. Going forward, everything he undertook was done for me. Despite the absence of a mother, love filled my life completely. It was after he met Vanya and I watched her interact with Shasha that I finally recognized what was absent.

Initially, I resented Vanya for barging into our lives, and I hated Shasha due to my jealousy over his close bond with his mother, alongside the fact that my father was stepping into a parental role for him. My rebellious nature persisted until that fateful day when I broke my leg, and Vanya was with me since my father had gone out of town. We began our relationship on shaky ground, but she grasped my perspective. Eventually, I came to cherish her deeply, and even though my father and I shared a profound bond, she took on the role of my mother and became my entire world.

"Could you all please keep it PG-13? Your child is present." I said

Mom responded with a light laugh, while Dad scoffed and planted a big kiss on her lips that prompted a giggle from her.

"Jesus Christ," I said, while facepalming.

"When you find the right person, you'll become even worse than we are."

"never happening. I have no need for another person in my life. I manage well by myself. I can live without the complications of being with someone," I exclaimed with a sigh, then went back inside.

I heard footsteps behind me as I entered. There was no question that it was my mom.

"Malyish (baby boy), Chto tebya bespokoit? (what's bothering you)"