Can anybody hear me

Where do you go when the one place that is meant to be a haven away from the cruelty of the world becomes the one place you fear the most. I wish I knew the answer to that myself.

I listened to the pitter patter of the heavy rain pouring down against my window. ITs days like these I welcomed. The soothing rhythmic beats of the rain, somehow having the power to relax me like no pill could. But like the inevitable the slamming of the front door caused my heart to speed and diminished any sense of relaxation, safeness making it seem like my imagination. Nothing could protect me from the person who's every footstep came closer making me cower further in my room.

Making me wish I could dissapear into my bed, become invisible.

Thump. Thump. THUMP.

The heavy footsteps stopped outside my door. My body trembled. Fear. I felt it in every pore of my body. The quietness felt like forever, but in reality it was probably only a second.

The hallway lights flooded into my room, creating a menacing shadow of the man that consumed my every thought. And not in a lovey dovey way, far from it in fact.

I deepened my breathing, faking sleep. I prayed to a god i didn't believe in, I hoped with everything I had he would believe my facade. But this was my life and not a movie. So instead of him walking back out, he came closer. And instead of me sighing in relief, I sobbed quietly. And so my nightmare began.

The sunlight peeked through my closed blinds, trying to break through the barrier. I fluttered my eyelids opened. I didn't want to wake, I wanted to stay in my state of unconsciousness. I rose slowly out of bed, the ache between my legs made me feel dirty, disgusting. But I will not wallow in my self pity. He diesnt deserve the satisfaction I'm making me feel worthless. Stepping into my bathroom I stare at my reflection. who is the girl staring at me with haunted eyes? It's hard to believe shes me.

I go through the motions of my morning routine. Brush my teeth. Take a shower. Change. Put on my makeup. It's a pointless routine to coverup my secret, but no one even realizes I'm broken emotionally and physically. Sometimes I beg for someone to look deep enough and figure it out, for my own knight to save me. So why do I cover it up... Because who would want someone that was raped by there own father?