Goiken High: Falling In Love

my baby, here on earth, showed me what my heart was worth

Firey has always been my bestest friend, like ever. We'd known each other since childhood, us being in the same neighborhood and all. We met when my family just moved in and hosted a housewarming party for the neighbors, and Firey's family attended. Me and him hit it off, and the rest is history. Safe to say, I've been there by his side for longer than most of his other friends, and he's been by my side for the same amount of time.

So, I've seen a lot of Firey. In fact, I'd seen more embarrassing moments of him then I can count! Like— like that one time where he tried to climb a tree and his pants fell down. Or when he was writing low quality fanfiction about Coiny and Pin, and Coiny walked into him writing it. Even though he's been embarrassing, he is the one I go to when I feel sad or disappointed or angry.

I thought our friendship was enough for me, but I guess lately, I've been wanting more of him. I mean— what's not to like about Firey? Loyal, kind, sincere.. basically the whole package. I can't exactly pinpoint where this silly— I guess technically... "crush" started to bloom, but I guess it started in middle school, seventh grade.

I sat curled up in the sheets of my bed with a few throw pillows around me and a big tub of vanilla ice cream half eaten through while Firey sat on the floor, sitting on a couch cushion with a bag of potato chips next to him. We were having a movie night after Pin brutally broke up with me in January, finding out she's actually straight. I.. still can't move on from that— and so it took a lot of convincing from Firey (oh, how the tables have turned) for him to come over.

Really, it was a hard time, considering Pin was one of my closest friends other than obviously Firey— and now that we've broken up, she's been avoiding me like the plague. It just felt.. everything felt so empty. Firey had to literally go down on his knees to convince me to make it a movie night. Honestly, it was so absurd that I just had to give in.

———

Sounds of Legally Blonde could be heard from the television screen in my room, but I was drowning it out with my own thoughts. It was a funny movie— yeah, but the girl only going to law because of her bad boyfriend made me cringe. It was a nice sentiment from Firey, but the break up still weighed on my mind and soured the sweetness of this whole idea of a movie night.

Firey was overly reacting to the plot in the movie in an attempt to be funny, but it just reminded me of Pin, who was always extra unironically. Elle, in the movie was currently attending a college party, and Firey reacted to that by laughing and saying,

"Hmm— college party? Like, kinda reminds me of that party back in autumn where Coiny threw water balloons at people, it was so hilarious!"

If I wasn't so hung up on Pin, that would've made me laugh, but the party reminded me of how Pin kissed me while we were both wet from the balloons that Coiny threw at us in an attempt to be a "wicked" prankster. That was our first kiss, and Firey took a picture of it. It wasn't just our first kiss, it was my first kiss. That picture was still on my nightstand, and I clutched it close at that comment.

We held the party in October, where me and Pin realized we both liked each other. I thought my crush was one sided, but at that party— with that kiss, I realized it wasn't. At that moment, I could still feel her wet lips pressed on mine, and her sweet lavender honey perfume.

At that moment too— I could also feel her pushing herself off me hurriedly, wide eyed and sweating as she whispered to me, "girls aren't supposed to be with girls" leaving the room to the January chill with the pieces of my shattered heart.

Firey finally looked back, looked at my mess of a body curled up in the blankets and pillows, —ice cream tubs all over the bed— holding the picture frame of our lost love on my chest and sobbing uncontrollably. Through my teary eyes, I could see him giving me a look that screamed apologetic. Then, he did something that I didn't anticipate— he got up on my bed, wrapped his arms around me, and hugged me tight.

Crying into his chest, limbs clinging to Firey, I wet his shirt with the waterworks of my eyes— blankets, pillows, frame and ice cream tubs forgotten. With my tears, I could feel his toned stomach more— and I could feel my broken heart mending slightly with the love radiating off of Firey. I think there, that moment in the sleepover— I truly fell in love with Firey.

He whispered into my ear softly, "I'm here for you, Leafy. It's going to be okay, trust me.."

I felt like I could cry another million rivers, but with Firey right beside me, his warmth clearing the darkness in my mind and allowing me to see the light, I felt.. okay. Like, Pin didn't matter that much anymore, and the cracks in my heart that she dug were filled in with new hope, possibilities, love.

Tearing myself away from my best friend, I wiped my eyes, put on a shakey smile that I actually meant— and switched the TV back on. Instead of Firey going back to the spot on the floor, he wrapped an arm around my shoulder and pushed me next to him. Really watching the movie now, I did laugh a few times at the ending.

——

Firey might have started as a rebound, another person to give me affection and love and caress my face while I cry just as Pin did— but it blossomed into something else over the months. If you asked me if I loved Pin before this movie night, I would say I still loved her, and I couldn't see how I could bring myself to get over her. But now, if you asked me the same thing, I would say she was a first love, but first loves never really work out.