Don't Criticize me!

⇠My Bed Is Cold Without You⇢

Oscar leaned his head against the chilly window of the aircraft, his heavy eyes fixed on the runway as his head pounded fiercely. He was pretty sure he was still intoxicated from last night, and his head was too foggy to think clearly. The Critic woke up on the couch, surrounded by various beer and food containers, but he couldn't recall what he did when Nigel left the hotel room last night. When he turned his phone back on to take a shower, he had hundreds of texts and missed calls from both his parents and his agency. He was hoping that the baker would have at least texted him or even called him but there was nothing. The older male's stomach was still bloated and pushing against his shirt's metal buttons, while his love handles were being pinched by the chair's armrests. Oscar had to fight the urge to call the other male all morning as he boarded the plane, watching as the assistants packed his suitcases and other belongings in the back of the plane. When the plane finally took off the anxiety and fear that settled in Oscar's stomach seemed to grow.

Oscar pulled out his laptop hoping that work would be able to distract him, which only worked for an hour before he slammed his laptop closed and asked the flight attendant for a soda and peanuts. The older male tossed the device into the chair next to him, running a hand through his wet hair. No matter how much work he wanted to get done he couldn't stop thinking about Nigel, and remembering the hurt on the younger male's face as he left the hotel. Oscar wanted to chase after him, begging the baker to listen to him and maybe come up with a solution for them. But he found his feet glued to the floor and different emotions bubbled in his chest. First was anger, he couldn't understand why Nigel couldn't see his side in this as well. He couldn't leave his job, he worked too hard for that, but he was also angry at the baker for making him choose as well. Oscar would never make the younger male choose between love and his store so why did he want Oscar to?

The next emotion that sparked in the chubby male's chest was happiness as the memories of their date came to mind. Oscar wasn't sure when it happened, maybe it was when they first met. Or maybe it was the first date they had and Nigel fed him, but the male had fallen for the younger male. And now the older male let the baker slip through his fingers and there was a very small chance of getting them back, of course, he had a choice. The older male could turn the plane around and rush to Nigel's little bakery begging him to take the chubby male back, telling the baker that he made a mistake and chose him. Oscar knew that option was still in his small deck of cards but that belonged in the unrealistic options. The older male also knew if his boss was sitting next to him that she'd smack him in the back of his head and call him an idiot. The male found himself smirking and chuckling lowly at that thought.

Finally was regret with a small mixture of sorrow. Oscar couldn't get the memory of the anger in Nigel's eyes or the way his hands shook as he shouted. There were so many things that the older male wanted to say to him, there were so many unsaid secrets that the chubbier male wanted to spill. Tears were forming in the corner of his eyes, blurring his vision slightly causing his headache to worsen. Oscar cursed under his breath, as his lip quivered slightly, the fight attendant snapped him out of his train of thought as she set his food and drink down on the plastic table. The chubbier male nodded his head toward her watching the woman disappear behind the curtain. Oscar shook Nigel to the back of his mind, eyes flicked back toward his laptop, reaching a shaky hand toward the device. Pushing his seat back as far as he could, Oscar laid the device on his lap turning on a movie to fall asleep to.

***

Oscar let out a loud exhale as he stepped into his modest flat, pushing his baggage aside and slamming the door shut. With his phone beeping in his pocket, he tossed his shoes and jacket onto the couch and made his way to the kitchen. After a few minutes of guzzling down a water bottle he had grabbed from the refrigerator, he threw the empty bottle into the sink pulling his phone from his pocket, and rolled his eyes as his bosse's name flashed across the screen. He wasn't in the mood to talk to anyone, all the chubbier male wanted to do was order shitty take-out and fall asleep in front of the TV with a shitty movie or TV show in the background. Oscar unlocked his phone, staring at the name for a long moment before sighing, pinching the bridge of his nose. Pressing the green button, the male brought the device to his ear, "What?" He growled.

The woman on the other end chuckled lowly, "I thought you'd be more chipper to finally be home. Don't tell me you actually liked Paris." She teased lightly. Oscar knew she was trying to rile him up, his boss had a knack for getting on his nerves easily and he wasn't entirely sure how the two became best friends.

The chubbier male rolled his eyes, sighing softly. "Of course not, I just got home and I'm exhausted." He replied. Technically it wasn't a total lie, his back and legs were sore from the plane's seats, and all the older male wanted to do was eat something even though he wasn't hungry at all and sleep.

The woman hummed and then shuffled in her seat. "Huh uh, wanna tell me what's really going on with you?" She insisted.

Yes, I just can't tell you about him because we fought and over now. He mentally growled. The older male fought the urge to snap at her, as anger flashed in his chest once more. It wasn't fair to her or himself to let his emotions get the better of him. Swallowing thickly and pushed the thought to the back of his head. "No. If you're not going to tell me what you want I'm going hang up and go to sleep." He stated through clenched teeth.

His boss barked out a laugh, and Oscar could hear her rolling her eyes. "Alright grumpy, I just wanted to tell you that your article on the bakery was a hit. The company wants to send you out again and follow this bakery trend that is sweeping the world." She explained.

Squeezing his eyes shut, Oscar shuffled into the living room, plopping down onto the couch. Draping an arm over his face he let out a soft sigh. Half of him wanted to snap and tell the other off demanding for some time off. Hoping that eating his emotions would help him at some point. Oscar knew that would only bring up memories of that night Nigel fed him pizza to his bursting point, his eyes flicked down at the round dome sitting on his lap wincing. The other half of him knew it was stupid and the best way to forget about the younger male was to just dive back into his work. If he was focused on something else then the memories would die eventually, he would just have to steer clear of Paris for the rest of his life. "When and Where?" He asked.

Oscar heard papers shuffling around on the other line, as the woman muttered under her breath. After a few minutes his boss cleared her throat, "Looks like they want to send you to a small village in London. Nothing too fancy, so it should only take you a day or two." She explained.

The chubbier male tangled his fingers in his hair, pulling slightly trying to distract himself. While chewing on the inside of his cheek until he tasted blood. He hated how Nigel had crept into his life and changed so much just for them to break up over a stupid fight. The older male felt like he was in high school all over again and that sent too many memories and emotions through him. "Send me the details on my phone or laptop, is there anything else you need?" He questioned.

His boss made a noise in the back of her throat, "Yeah, are you okay?" She quizzed.

Oscar scoffed, shaking his head. "I'm fine," he said.

It was his boss's turn to scoff, "You don't sound fine, though, Oscar; I have known you long enough to know when something is wrong. You can talk to me; you know that, right?" She asked.

The chubbier male smiled softly, nodding his head slowly. He really did know he could tell her anything, and it would be a secret. His boss was the only person Oscar told everything to; there were too many drunk nights where the older male could call her and spill whatever was in his brain to her. "Of course I know; I'm fine, promise." He whispered.

The woman hummed, waiting for him to continue speaking; when nothing came, she sighed. "If you're sure, I'll see you tomorrow." She said, before hanging up.

Oscar wasn't sure when he made it back to his room, slipping off his clothing and tossing it into the corner of the room. The chubbier male brushed his teeth, grabbing another glass of water before walking back into his bedroom. Sliding into his silken sheets, he brought his pillow to his chest, letting the coolness soak into his hot chest. The tears that formed in the corner of his eyes started spilling down his pale cheeks, creating dark spots on the pillow buried underneath his chin. The darkness that crept into the corner of his blurred vision seemed to grow as exhaustion washed over his body. Shortly afterward, sleep finally overtook him.