𝐀 𝐥𝐨𝐯𝐞 𝐰𝐢𝐭𝐡 𝐚𝐧 𝐞𝐱𝐩𝐢𝐫𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧 𝐝𝐚𝐭𝐞.
Vivian Rae has only a year to live. Instead of spending his remaining time with the woman he swore to love until his last breath, he makes an unexpected request: he asks his doctor to be his f...
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I knew something was wrong.
The pain had become a constant companion, gnawing at me from the inside, growing stronger every day.
But I pushed through it. I had to. There were things left to do, promises to keep, and a life to pretend to live.
But today- today, I couldn't push anymore.
I was walking through the park, Amara’s laughter ringing in my ears from our earlier conversation, when suddenly everything tilted sideways.
The world spun, and I felt the ground rush up to meet me. The last thing I remembered was Amara’s terrified scream.
When I opened my eyes, the bright lights of the hospital room greeted me, and the pain in my chest felt like a thousand knives stabbing all at once. I winced, trying to move, but the effort was too much.
"Vivian!" Amara's voice cut through the fog in my head. She was by my side in an instant, her eyes wide with worry.
“What happened?” I managed to rasp out.
“You collapsed,” she whispered, brushing my hair out of my eyes. “The cancer- it's getting worse. You need surgery, Vivian. It’s the only way.”
I stared at her, the fear gnawing at my insides worse than the pain.
Surgery.
I knew what that meant. There were no guarantees. But I also knew that if I didn’t do it, I wouldn’t last long.
“I can’t leave him alone, Amara,” I croaked. “My dad- you have to look after him if anything happens to me. Promise me that.”
She bit her lip, tears glistening in her eyes, but she nodded.
“I promise.”
"And if this the last time I'm seeing you," words fell short, I was scared, not of death but of losing. "Thank you-"
As they prepped me for surgery, I felt the cold bite of fear tightening around my heart. I didn’t want to die. Not now. Not when I was finally beginning to see what life could be like with Amara.
But the truth was harsh—I might not make it out of this.
As the anesthesia started to pull me under, I heard her voice, soft and trembling. “Vivian- I love you.”
Those words echoed in the darkness as I slipped away, into the black void of unconsciousness.
I was suspended in a strange place, somewhere between life and death. Memories flooded me—flashes of the past, Vani, My mother, Dada. Amara!
Images of Amara’s face, the sound of her laugh.
I was fighting, fighting so hard to come back to her, to the life that I suddenly realized I wanted so desperately.
But it was an uphill battle. The pain was overwhelming, pulling me deeper into the abyss, and a part of me just wanted to let go. It would be easier that way, to just give up. But I couldn’t. Not when she had said she loved me.
I couldn't leave her alone.
When I finally woke up, the room was quiet except for the steady beep of the machines around me.
I blinked, feeling weak, every muscle in my body aching. The pain was still there, but it was different now—less sharp, more distant.
I turned my head slightly and saw Amara, asleep in a chair next to my bed, her head resting on her arm. She looked exhausted, but even in sleep, there was a peace about her that made my chest tighten.
She had been there the whole time, I realized. She had never left my side. My heart swelled with an emotion I couldn’t quite name, something that scared me as much as it warmed me.
“Amara-” I whispered, my voice hoarse.
She stirred and slowly opened her eyes, her expression shifting from confusion to joy when she saw I was awake.
“Vivian!” she gasped, rushing to my side. “You’re awake! Thank God-”
I tried to smile, but it came out as more of a grimace. “How long?”
“Two weeks,” she said, her voice trembling with relief. “You were out for two weeks.”
“Two weeks-” I echoed, letting that sink in. “How's Dada?”
“Worried, but never lost faith,” she smiled softly, but her eyes were filled with tears. “You survived, Vivian. That’s all that matters.”
I reached out a trembling hand to touch her cheek, marveling at how soft her skin was. “You stayed with me.”
“Of course I did,” she said, her voice catching. “Where else would I be? I'm your doctor!”
Liar!
"How can I repay?"
“Don’t say that,” she whispered. “I’m just glad you’re here. That you’re alive.”
I didn’t have the strength to tell her how much that meant to me, how much her presence had pulled me through. But as I lay there, watching her wipe away her tears, I knew I didn’t need to say it.
Over the next few days, I began the slow, painful process of recovery. It wasn’t easy—every day felt like a struggle, every step forward a monumental effort.
But Amara was always there, helping me, encouraging me, making me laugh even when all I wanted to do was give up.
She brought me books to read, played music for me, and when her shift was over, she’d sit with me, telling me stories about her day, making me feel like I was still part of the world outside these four walls.
Our bond grew stronger with each passing day, but the words we both needed to say were left unspoken.
There was a bond, much more than love between us, a deep, unspoken connection, but neither of us dared to voice it.
Maybe it was fear—fear that saying it out loud would make it too real, too painful to bear when we both knew it was not meant to be. She deserves better and what I've given her was pain.
And so, I kept my feelings to myself, holding onto them like a lifeline, even as my body grew weaker and the pain became harder to bear.
I didn’t want to burden her with my love. But as I watched her care for me, her gentle touch, her quiet strength, I couldn’t help but wonder if maybe, just maybe, we could have had something real. Something lasting.
If only the situation were different. If I hadn't loved Vani.
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AUTHOR'S NOTE: Hey readers, let's talk about crushes!! I've got this crush on this cute guy in my class. More like a conventional crush. I'll just stare at him, until this attraction subdue.
