Espresso

Chapter Eighteen

Trigger Warning - eating disorder behaviours and mild body dysmorphia. 

Jet

I awake with a start, eyes shooting open as I feel the bus skid to a halt, the brakes creaking beneath the vehicle as it slows to a stop, jolting me forward as it does so. My bunk is still dark, the curtain pulled firmly across and I can hear the soft snores of the other girls from behind the thin material. 

I sigh and squeeze my pillow a little more, pulling it closer, frowning when I realise it feels firmer than usual against my cheek, the material not as malleable in my grip. I knit my eyebrows together and try again, only to realise that what I'm tugging on is breathing. I jump a little as I glance up, my hazy morning gaze being met with the slightest hint of a smirk. 

What the - ? 

"Good morning," Harry rasps, eyes still closed but amusement evident in his husky voice. 

"Morning," I whisper, too embarrassed to say anything else. 

He mindlessly plays with the ends of my hair, threading his fingers through the tips of my tangled locks, eyes still closed. I flutter my own eyelids closed, sighing in contentment as he wraps the strands around his long fingers, his chest rising and falling slowly. I reach my fingertips up and trace patterns on his chest atop his white t-shirt, and he chuckles, chest vibrating beneath my touch. 

"That tickles," he whispers. 

I immediately pull my hand away and look at him, "sorry."

He opens his eyes and looks down at me with a coy smile on his face, "I didn't say stop."

My cheeks flush but I smile shyly, burying my head back into his chest. 

"Don't be going all shy on me," he teases, reaching for my hand and moving it back to his chest. 

I don't know how long we lie there in the darkness, words unspoken between us as I trace endless patterns into his chest. I don't even know what time it is. 

I eventually shuffle under the covers, rising to sit up and rubbing sleep from my eyes. I peel back the duvet and climb over him, my thighs essentially straddling his waist as I hover over him.

"Never thought I'd see you in this position," he smirks. 

"Fuck off, I need a wee." 

I peek my head round the side of the curtain to check that the coast is clear before pulling it back and hopping out of the bunk. Just as I'm about to close the curtain again, he gently grabs my wrist so that I turn back towards him, his head raised off the pillow. 

"You are coming back though, yeah?"

I nod and he settles back down into my bunk as I close the curtain and follow the red lights on the floor of the small corridor towards the bathroom. 

I sit on the toilet rubbing my eyes, noticing that it's only 4:30am according to the clock on the bathroom wall. I finish my business and wash my hands before taking my toothbrush and washcloth from my shelf so that I can freshen up.

My thoughts swirl as I brush my teeth and hair, wondering how I ended up with Harry in my bunk overnight and more importantly, why. We've successfully been in each other's company for four hours without fighting which must be a new record for us. I don't know what's going on; I'm too tired to care, though why I'm freshening up to go back to sleep is beyond me.