A Blood Soaked Throne - Part Two

Sixteen - Alayah

My heart stops as I stand in the doorway to the bedroom, listening to Damien talk to Cyrus. He's leaving me behind. It hurts more than any physical pain ever could, and he's not even going to say goodbye. The air that's trying to fill my lungs feels trapped in my throat. I want to scream, to run after him, to tell him that I'm not letting him do this alone.

Bastian wants me. If anyone should be going to the castle it should be me. Damien doesn't have to risk any of this, it's my fault he's in this situation. Regret that I didn't take Bastian's last deal claws at my stomach. I could have saved him, and instead I'll have to watch him die - again.

I have to calm down, I won't be able to do anything if I'm shaking so much that I can't even walk. My lungs burn as I force down a few deep breaths. I can do this. I open the door to the bedroom, a few minutes having passed since I heard Damien exit the bar. Cyrus is sitting on the couch, the color absent from his skin. He looks up at me with a startled and pitying expression, unable to keep the grief out of his eyes. Damien's not dead, he's going to live. I have to keep telling myself that until I believe it.

"I'm going with him," I say, watching as the shock continues to grow on his face. "I won't let him do this alone."

Cyrus stands, his eyes not leaving mine. "You heard?" His voice cracks, the emotions of Damien leaving affecting him just as much as me.

I swallow, unable to allow myself to fall apart. "I need your help Cyrus. I can't get into the upper district without you. Please, I need to be there in case..." In case he dies. I can't think about that. "I need to be there."

He looks at me with wavering eyes, his promise to Damien just moments ago already starting to crack. He's been here before, left behind without a choice.

"I promised him I would try to keep you safe. Taking you to the castle isn't exactly keeping that promise." He shakes his head, but he seems unsure. He runs a hand through his hair, further messing up the loose ponytail he's pulled it back into.

"I'm tired of running. If Damien dies none of this matters anyway. I need to at least try to help him." I can see the gears turning in his head as he fights over keeping his promise to Damien or allowing me the choice he was never given.

"Please Cyrus," I beg him one last time. I have no hope of making it through the upper district without him , but that isn't going to stop me from trying. I'll be captured, but maybe I can still talk Bastian into letting Damien live if he has me back.

I start to turn towards the staircase, unwilling to change my mind, when he mumbles quietly under his breath and reaches a hand out to stop me.

"Fine, I'll take you to the castle." He undoes the tie that holds his hair together and fixes the mess of lightly colored hair as we head down the stairs and out the front door. The sign above the bar shines brightly against the pitch black sky and a wave of fear that I can't push back down threatens to drag me back inside. Cyrus takes another deep breath beside me, his own resolve weakening as well. "I'm going to regret this."