Belladonna - Spencer Reid

𖤓 Broken ☾

Reid sat at his desk, filling in paperwork absentmindedly. Hotch walks up to JJ across the room. "How is he doing?" He asks him, watching Reid.

"Same as the past 2 weeks." JJ replies. "Skipped his psych appointment today, and he's only been doing paperwork." 

Hotch nods, concerned. "He should be back in the field soon, get his head on straight." JJ nods. "But he can't get cleared without going to the appointments." 

Spencer stands up then, walking out of the office and standing outside. "I'll try to talk to him." JJ offers, and with a nod from Hotch, goes to walk outside, finding Reid there.

Reid was staring and his hands, where he was flicking a lighter on and off repetitively. "Spence?" JJ asks softly, and he turns his head to look at her, tucking the lighter away in his pocket.

"JJ." He says back. "What can I do for you?" He looks at her, and she can't tell if it's annoyance or exhaustion displayed  on his face.

"What's going on with you?" She asked, and a wry chuckle is all she hears.

"I don't know JJ, I was kidnapped for days. Again, might i add." He leans back against the wall. "And all anyone cares about is how long it'll take me to be the resident genius again." 

"We just want you to be happy." JJ says, and walks in front of him. "Just go to the psych evals?" She asks, and Reid sighs. 

"Fine." He says, and walks back inside, straight up the stairs to the appointment room. "Sorry I'm late." He says dryly, and sits in the chair, facing towards the door.

𖤓 ------------------------------------------------------ ☾

2 weeks ago

"What do you like for breakfast?" Aspen asks him, leaning comfortably across the counter. She reaches a hand out, offering him a cup of coffee, extra sugars. 

Reid smiles at her, the way her hair shines in the beams of sunlight coming through the room. her eyes are piercing, yet gentle, and he can't tear his gaze away. After a brief moment, she raises her eyebrows in question and he coughs, shaking himself out of it. "Oh um- donuts?" He asks, and she grins.

"Donuts sound perfect." She walks around the counter and takes his hand, pulling him out of the apartment into the streets of New Orleans, Louisiana, where they would be staging the kidnapping the next day.

"When I was younger, we lived here for a couple years, Father owned some properties here." She says as they walk, fingers intertwined. "I would always sneak out, just to get an apple fritter from this bakery."

He looks at the brightness on her face, finding it hard to believe that she had ever killed someone. "I'm a fan of a classic, I always get chocolate frosting with sprinkles." He says and she laughs.

"A perfect choice, very you." He looks around, taking in the small bakery, complete with comfortable chairs and bookshelves lining the walls. "Pick a spot, I'll get our food."

He walks over to a small table in the corner with a window covered in hanging plants. A moment later, she walks back, sitting next to him and holding out his donut. "Do you miss them? The BAU?"

"I do, they've been my support through everything." He says, and she nods. "All of the things I went through, like I told you, the torture, the dilaudid, my mom." 

She squeezes his hand then, and he blushes a bit. "I'm glad they were there for you. I hope you'll let me be here for you too, while I'm around." He nods, very aware of how close they were.

"I'd like that too." He says, leaning in a bit farther. "I can be here for you too, y'know. You have my number after all." She looks deeply into his eyes, silently looking for an answer to an unspoken question.

He very subtly nods, and they lean in closer, and right before their lips could touch, her phone rings, and they both jump, startled. "Khai?" She asks, a tone of annoyance in her voice.

"The message has been sent. Get him in location C, and prepare him the best you can." Khai says. 

"And tell him to give Aaron Hotchner a kiss for me when he sees him!" Alis yells from the background, laughing. Reid rolls his eyes, but laughs a little despite himself.

"Tell Alis he should kiss him himself if he's so cool." Reid says, and even Khai laughs. "So I'm leaving?"

"As soon as they show up." Khai answers. "Aspen. Quickly please."

"Consider it done." Aspen says, and the line clicks dead. "Well it's time to go." He nods, the moment seemingly dissipated.

𖤓 ------------------------------------------------------ ☾

"You were found drugged and unconscious, do you remember anything from when you were with your kidnappers?" The psychologist asks.

"It's mostly a blur." Reid responds. "I didn't even realize how much time was passing until I got back." The psychologist nods, writing notes down as he spoke.

"Do you feel any sort of anger towards your captors? Resentment?" She questions, and he nods.

"I think it would be wrong not to, to wish things had happened differently." He says, and she smiles in understanding. "Ended diferently..."

She folds her notebook in her lap leaning forward. "Considering everything that has happened, I believe you are handling everything very well." He smiles back at her. "I feel comfortable clearing you to work, but don't go if you need more time. Do what is best for you."

"Thank you." Reid responds, and stands up, shaking her hand and leaving, the sleeve of his sweater coming ap to reveal the base of words, tattooed in the past few days. 

𖤓 ------------------------------------------------------ ☾

2 weeks ago

"Mortui Vivos Docent" 

Reid traces a finger along the letters etched on the back of her neck. "The Dead Teach The Living." 

Aspen nods. "Exactly. We each got one when Father died, to symbolize loyalty to each other." He drops his hand and she turns to face him. "Symbolizing his death, and how we move past free from him, and will always be dedicated to the family."

He sits down into the chair behind him. "I like it." He says, and she smiles at him, tying his ankles to the legs of the chair. "I really like you, Grim." He said, using the alias that he had heard over the past few days.

"I like you too Spence. But we live in two entirely different worlds." He furrows his brows. She hands him a glass of water and sleeping pills. "Once you take these, we won't see each other again."

He leans towards her, frowning. "No, I don't want that. I want to know you, to be with you." He says, upset, but takes the glass and pills anyway. Once she takes it back after he takes a sip and puts it down, she reaches up to his face.

He fingers gently run across his jaw, her eyes soft. "I will not ask you to choose between me and the BAU. So I am taking myself out of the equation." She offers him a small sad smile, and he nods. 

"What if I wanted to choose you?" He asks her. She doesn't say anything, but leans in, softly touching her lips to his in a gentle kiss.

"Goodbye Spencer." She says, and his world fades to black, a smile on his face.

𖤓 ------------------------------------------------------ ☾

"What tattoo do you have?" The psychologist asks, and Reid smiles.

"Mortui Vivos Docent" He replies. "It means 'The Dead Teach The Living" 

"Oh wow!" She says, intrigued. "I love tattoos, why did you get it?"

"To commemorate the BAU, and the cases we've solved." He says, a small smile on his face. "And to show that I survived."

"I think that's beautiful!" She gets up as well, leading them towards the door. He looks lost in thought as he answers.

"I do too."