How Everything Changed for the Better

Chapter V

Liz wakes up at the sound of her alarm, going to shut it off before looking at the phone. Call active: 9:42:09. She grabs the phone to check the contact name. Hayden. Her eyes widen. She fell asleep on the call with me? She thinks, an involuntary hint of a smile starting on her face as she reaches over her bed to get her glasses. The quiet noises at the other end of the call are infrequent, and Liz assumes Hayden is still sleeping. She checks the time, which shows just after 6 a.m. She sits up on the bed, kicking off her blanket and grumbling to herself as she begrudgingly gets dressed. Even with the excitement of the second run, the thought of going to classes makes her head hurt already. When 6:28 hits and she doesn't hear any sign of Hayden waking up, she clears her throat before speaking up. "Hayden? It's almost 6:30; we have school today." She whispers, cringing about the thick accent in her words.

She never liked her accent. Everyone always commented about it, whether it was calling her British or Spanish or making fun of her. She hears a quiet hum in response to her words, and she smiles lightly. "Hayden, c'mon. You have to get up and get ready," she repeats, her words gentle.

Finally, she hears moving at the other end of the call, while at the same time putting on her backpack and grabbing her keys. "Hmmm?" she hears before words follow.
"Hiiii..."

"Good morning; you have to get up to get ready, Hayden." Liz responds, brushing her hair.

A couple minutes later, she hangs up the phone, sure that Hayden will be up and ready now rather than being late, still giddy that she stayed on call with her. She finally leaves her house, heading for the bus all the while ignoring Anthony, and soon also Katie when she goes on the bus. Things will be changing from now on. For the better.

I lean my head against the window of my mom's car on the way back to the movie theater. With each growing day, I'm more drained, yet I'm putting more out. I'm tired yet, not knowing why. Ever since Liz dropped Anthony and Katie, she has been around me all the time, and I still don't understand why. All I can think about is how it feels like I'm being used because she didn't have anyone else to go to other than the girl crazy over her. My mom looks over at me while I continue to stare at my phone and at the messages between me and Liz, where I'm trying to decipher every message for some sort of answer. "What's wrong?" Mom asks, and I finally look over at her.

"I'm just tired, and I don't know if I'm being used." I tell her, giving in. There is no point in hiding it anymore.

Another moment of silence. Zoey and Caleb, my two younger siblings, sit in the backseat, half asleep. It's way past 8 p.m., and we are on our way back from the movie theater. I was tired, but tears started to prick my eyes from the conversation already. Stupid feelings. "Talk to me," Mom says, and I finally look over at her.

She is staring at me, alternating between the road and my face. "My friend. She was talking to me, but after a while, she stopped and hung out with her own friends. Completely dismissed me. I thought I did something wrong, but the moment she dropped them, I was suddenly the only person she wanted to be around. I don't understand." I mumble, hugging myself and turning off my phone.

"You can't keep putting 1000% on everyone; you'll wear yourself out. You need to have a talk with her, because you can't keep getting like this because we are trying to get you to heal. Sometimes people need others, but that doesn't mean to excuse everything. But have empathy. Be yourself." Mom answers, and we pull into the driveway of our house.

I nod, wiping at my tears even though they keep coming. At least wait until you're in your room to cry; it's okay. I tell myself. I get out of the car, the cool November air hitting me as I walk into the house, hazy. It feels like a dream, walking up the stairs and to my room, and the only time I snap out of it is when I text Liz.