The Rebellious : Dark and Dangerous

chapter two

" harder" I pushed the guy in font of me pressing both hands on his trembling chest as he flew back falling on the ground .

He shifted again and ran towards me , his confidence fading .

This is his seventh try , I could smell his fear , his hesitation .. I don't want them to be afraid of me , at least not while exercising for a possibly much bigger threat to their lives .

"stop" I growled loudly and caught everyone else's attention .

"I do not want you to be in this state , I don't want to see fear taking the best of you , do not fear me , I am here to help you , to avenge the lost lives of our loved ones , to throw away the days of slavery behind . most importantly do not fear your target , your enemy will be able to see it in you , to smell it even . fear will damage you , it will make it a lot easier for them to take us down" I spoke to all of them looking at each and every one of them as sweat dripped from their foreheads , dirt covering their faces , they are trying ..

What's worse than being scared , is having your people around you more scared then you are.

I shook my head pushing back these pessimistic thoughts , they need me .

It is rather natural for them to be frightened if I am myself .

That's why I must be there for them and push back everything that gets in the way .

"I can only tell you to dream of a better future to us , a better memory of the innocent lives we lost years before . if that is not enough to keep you motivated and ready for more , then I suggest you step aside and let others do your work for you . we are in a position where we can not handle any slips . so bare with me or step aside" I addressed them , speaking calmly .

I stood waiting for someone to step aside , to say that he has had enough , to break down and announce that he can not take this anymore .but instead I stood as I watched their faces lit up with hope , some with soft smiles playing at the corners of their lips , some excited and getting ready for more , and I had a warm feeling running inside me that I could not figure out what it was .

I felt disgusted , I hate these warm feelings , making me feel like a teenage girl.

I haven't felt happiness , nor love since the day I lost my parents . I haven't experienced the tenderness provided by my mother , the warmness and coziness of being home .

I have never laughed , just gave away fake smiles .

I don't believe in love , nor falling or being loved .

The stories of how the moon goddess has a special person for each and everyone of us , so none of us spends his life alone , to make sure we experience love and not die with no one by our side.

A mate .

The thought alone makes me laugh with disgust . if the moon goddess does not believe of the strongest form of love which is provided by the only two willing to shower you with unconditional love and be there for you since the day you had your first look in this life , then there is not any other true form of love worth mentionning .

If the connection between mates is so strong then how come the connection between parents and children is so underestimated ? is this person really able to love you just like they did ? trust you and protect you like they spent their lives doing ?

I don't believe so .

The gods took away my only source of love , the only people who showed it to me . and for me no other type of love Is worthy nor enough to fill that hole in my heart , getting deeper each day knowing I'm still alone , without my parents .