My friend the devil

What would you do if your friend whom you have known for nearly 20 years tried to rape you?

I'll tell you what I did. I ran. Out into the dark and into the woods.

You might want to know if there hadn't been any red flags before. Back then I couldn't see it- but thinking back right now I should have run away a long time ago.

We met through mutual friends and became best buddies right away. It was the end of our school career and we quickly made plans what to do afterwards. He was funny and crazy at the same time. Exactly what you need as a 19 year old boy. We traveled through Asia and this experience bond us together. Going out with him was interesting. Seeing how quickly he got close with people especially with women was eyeopening. His appearance defined with his blonde hair and blue eyes and a masculine bodyshape attracted women in an extraordinary way. A fling here, a fling there, great love with several girls- how could I think he was gay?

But there was something dark around him. Later when the teenage time was over I got to know this side too. When I went out with him, things started happening to me. For instance I lost my purse, got in argument with my girlfriend, I got robbed or even hurt myself. Awkard situations that only happened when he was around. Mostly because he convinced me to do certain things which I actually didn't want to do. But his charms and the way he talked always let me give in. 

One time he even managed to persuaded me to break up with my girlfriend. I can recall this moment very clearly. Every reason was so well elaborated that I was finally convinced that she is not the one. Thinking back I know how stupid and weak I was. But I just couldn't resist his logics.

Time went by and I left the city for work. I got married and had kids. Now and then we wrote each other. He got married too and had kids as well. His career plans as a doctor worked out very well. Although his medical skills were average, he could fool people by his appearance and manners. 

Last year I visited my hometown and we made plans to see each other after a long time. He bought a cabin somewhere in the woods as a getaway. He suggested we'd meet there and spend the night in his cabin. What I didn't mention was that we used to do some drugs when we were young. Not much. Some joints and three or four times we had some magic mushrooms. 

He picked me up at my parents' place and we drove nearly 90 minutes until we got there. It was nice and cosy. He renovated it on his own. The childrens' room had two beds that I could use later.

"Look, what I have!" He shouted frantically and showed a little plastic bag of some weed and mushrooms. At first I was very enthusiastic about it. Going back to the good old times seemed the only right thing to do. Family life wasn't really fullfilling. Why not I thought. But after two minutes I told him that don't want to do it. I had plans with my kid the other day. And I am not that dad walking around with his kid. Still drugged. First he seemed to be dazzled about my decision. Saying it is one out of a lifetime thing. The more he talked, the more darker it got around him. That was the first time that day I felt quite uncomfortable being at his place. Something told me to leave but I just didn't listen. 

Later he pretended as if nothing had happened and boiled some tea for us. He said that it was a special green tea with strong aftertaste. In fact it was a strong tea but I was used to exotic tastes when it came to Asian tea. After a cup I felt dizzy and strange. I looked at him. He smiled. It didn't make any sense to me. "Why are you laughing?" I asked. "As I can see, it already started to kick in" he said. He drugged me. At first I thought whatever. But he began acting strange minute by minute. Apparently he didn't drink any tea. He was very clear and focused. It started slow.

He put his hands around my face and told me how beautiful I was. I couldn't react. I was petrified.

Then he said things like "we're meant to be together and that I should let myself go". That's when it hit me. If I don't react something will happen. Something I don't want to happen. I'm not gay. So I told him. "I'm not gay. Stop it."

Suddenly his eyes became cold and angry. He pushed me on the sofa and said something I will never forget. "Relax you little princess" he yelled at me. I looked at him. He was way taller and stronger than me. I would have no chance fighting him. It came to me like lightning. That's how women feel when it is about to happen. Helpless. 

I am drugged and in the woods. It was getting dark outside. But nevertheless I had to leave.

When he went to his bedroom, I took the chance. I got my shoes and my jacket. Luckily my cell phone and my wallet were in my jacket's pocket. I didn't close the door to avoid noise.

I ran. As fast as I can. My heart was beating fast. I was afraid. I don't know how long I ran. But  I finally saw a road. After five minutes a car drove by. I waved and it stopped. It was an older man. He was very surprised to see someone in his village. I told him that my car broke down and I needed a train or bus station to go home. When I arrived home, I went straight to bed. As I sat on my bed, something occured to me. The belief in the good in people died that day and awareness of evil was born. I will never be the same again I thought. The naive man is gone.

There in the darkness of the room I felt like a child again. Monsters must be everywhere. I didn't feel safe anymore. Thanks to my friend the devil.