† 𝐅𝐚𝐥𝐥𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐟𝐨𝐫 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐟𝐨𝐫𝐛𝐢𝐝𝐝𝐞𝐧 † Angels Love

Chapter 20

Star's POV

The night air was cold against my skin as I ran, the wind whipping through my hair, stinging my eyes. My breath came in ragged gasps, each one a painful reminder of the wound on my arm. Blood seeped through my fingers where I clutched the cut, the sticky warmth a sharp contrast to the chill of the evening. My heart pounded in my chest, not just from exertion, but from the terror that gripped me, propelling me forward.

How had things gone so wrong?

Christopher's eyes had been wild with anger, the blade in his hand flashing in the dim light of the garden. I could still see it, the way it had arced through the air, the sharp, metallic hiss it made as it sliced through the space between us. I hadn't even had time to react, only felt the sting of the blade as it nicked my arm, the shock of pain bursting through me like a firecracker. And then, everything had been chaos.

I stumbled, nearly tripping over my own feet, my legs trembling beneath me. I forced myself to keep moving, my mind a jumbled mess of fear and confusion. I didn't know where I was going, only that I had to get away. Away from him, away from the look in his eyes when he realized what he'd done. A look that had been so filled with rage and regret, it made my blood run cold.

My vision blurred with tears, and I bit my lip to keep from crying out. Christopher had almost attacked me. No, he had attacked me. He'd swung his sword, and I'd been too slow to dodge. I'd never seen him like that before—so angry, so lost in his own fury. It was like he'd become someone else, someone I didn't recognize. The thought terrified me, but not as much as the realization that came with it.

Despite everything, despite the anger and the hurt, despite the fact that he'd nearly hurt me, I still cared about him. The truth hit me like a physical blow, stealing the breath from my lungs. Even now, with blood trickling down my arm and my heart pounding in my ears, I couldn't stop thinking about him, about the way he'd looked at me before everything had gone wrong. The vulnerability in his eyes, the softness in his voice when he said my name. 

I was terrified of him, but I was even more terrified of losing him.

How could I feel this way? How could I still care, still want to be near him, after what he'd done? But the answer was already there, buried deep in my chest. 

I loved him. 

I loved Christopher. 

It wasn't supposed to be like this. We weren't supposed to be anything more than rivals, than enemies. We'd made a bet, a stupid, meaningless bet about who would fall first, and now here I was, bleeding and alone in the darkness, realizing that I'd lost.

I couldn't stop the tears from falling now, hot and heavy down my cheeks. I pressed harder against the wound, the pain a small comfort, something to focus on besides the ache in my heart. I was afraid of him, afraid of what he might do, afraid of how much he could hurt me. But more than that, I was afraid of losing him. Of never seeing him again, of never hearing his voice, feeling his touch.

In that moment, I forgot about my dad, his consequences, the consequences of the school, of the state, what happened to my brother... 

The night seemed to close in around me, the shadows stretching long and dark. I slowed to a stop, my chest heaving, the wound on my arm throbbing with each beat of my heart. I leaned against a tree, pressing my forehead to the rough bark, trying to catch my breath. My mind was spinning, the realization of my feelings crashing over me in waves.

I loved him. 

I didn't want to, didn't mean to, but it was there, undeniable and unyielding. It had been there all along, hidden beneath the surface, growing with each look, each touch, each moment we shared. I loved Christopher, and that love was stronger than the fear, stronger than the pain.

But what did that mean now? How could we ever go back to what we had? How could I ever look at him the same way, knowing what he was capable of? Knowing what I was capable of feeling for him? The confusion was like a storm inside me, each thought clashing with the next, leaving me lost and helpless.

I sank to the ground, my back against the tree, the darkness of the garden pressing in around me. I didn't know what to do, where to go. All I knew was that I couldn't stop the way I felt. I couldn't change the fact that Christopher had become a part of me, that his presence was as necessary to me as the air I breathed.

I was afraid of him. I was afraid of how much I loved him. And that, more than anything, was what scared me the most.

I had to talk to him. I had to tell him the truth.