I don't understand...
I always say this: *I don't understand,*
But it's because—
There's love in the way you look into my eyes,
In the way you hold me close,
In the way your lips kiss mine,
In the way you speak to me with words that linger in the air.
There's love even in the hesitation—
In the way you think twice about cuddling,
Afraid to lose yourself in our love again,
Afraid that too much closeness will pull us under.
We both tremble at the edge,
Frightened of falling once more,
Blinded by love's fierce light,
Afraid of losing ourselves to its flames.
So we let our egos rise,
Swallowing the tenderness between us.
Are you afraid of what might stir inside you?
Afraid of love's blinding power?
Afraid of losing pieces of yourself in the tide of us?
Afraid that you'll forget your path in the shadows of mine?
Afraid to let your feelings flow,
To lose yourself in the flood?
Because, oh Baby, I see it in your eyes—
That look, that cursed look,
One you've never given to anyone else.
Why do we keep lying to ourselves?
What are we running from?
Why are we so scared of our feelings
That we sabotage them the moment they grow too strong?
As if we fear being consumed by the fire.
We're both in love, but we recoil when it gets too close,
Fearing the burn, the flames that might consume us whole.
The dark wears many disguises,
And we've dressed our love in shadow,
Unaccustomed to emotions that scream so loud.
But we force ourselves to kept quiet .
The deepest pain is knowing—
We are so close, yet so far apart.
So close to happiness,
Yet so distant from its warmth.
So near the fire,
Yet terrified of the burn.
Because where there is desire, there is gonna be a flame,
And where there is a flame, someone's bound to get burned.
We're both afraid of being that someone,
So we push each other away,
Even when all we want is to stay.
But just because it burns doesn't mean you're gonna die,
And maybe, just maybe,
A little fire isn't all that bad.
Each time we drift apart,
Our memories turn to ecstasy in my mind,
A painful pleasure,
Knowing how wrong it is to want more.
I think of it as if it were just a dream,
A lucid dream slipping through my fingers.
I start to miss you more than life itself,
Everything becomes a reminder of you.
I start feeling dizzy,
And it's always when you're out of sight,
That I see glimpses of us everywhere—
In every corner, every sound, every breath.
And I'm left with this thought,
*I miss u so much, even though I know how wrong it is.*
We feel unfinished, and it tears me apart.
But I guess we're just two kids in this vast world,
Afraid of losing our small selves,
Afraid of the burn,
Afraid of being consumed by it all.
The hardest pill to swallow is knowing that tomorrow, you're not mine.
Because at the start of every day, it was always you.
But at the end of everything,
I'll still wish you the best—
With or without me.
Because at the end of everything, when fear falls away,
That love,
That love was real.
But we don't want to get burned.
———
« where there is desire, there is gonna be a flame and where there is a flame, someone's bound to get burned.» Pink
« The hardest pill to swallow is knowing that tomorrow, you're not mine. » Nessa Barret, lie.
