Nostalgia

Cotton Candy & Tacos & Burritos

I pulled my hair up into a pony tail, slung my bag over my shoulder, and went downstairs, slipping my shoes on while I walked. My mom was finally home from work and now taking me to the fair that was only in town for a couple days. I thought it might be fun, considering how close I was to her. 

There wasn't much of an age difference between my mom and I, only sixteen years. Yes, that means she had me at sixteen, and yes, it was a stupid choice she had made as a teenager. But it resulted in me, and just in time. Around the time I was one, my mom got Leukemia, a type of cancer. As a result of the sickness and all of the chemo, she couldn't have any children after that. 

As a result, I'm pretty fond of her. 

"Ready?" She asked me.

"Yeah," I told her, nodding. 

We headed out the door and into our little silver car, heading off to the fair. Once we got there, I saw an assortment of things; a Ferris Wheel, along with many other rides that were sure to turn your stomach, a bubble pit, food trucks lined up for what seemed miles, a big stage with some chairs set up front, and store vendors set up with booths next to the stage. 

As soon as we got out of the car, I could smell the food trucks. There was a strong smell of tacos and other things mixed in, but tacos were more on my mind right now than anything else. I smiled for real the first time all day.

The first place we headed to was the booths to see what kinds of things the vendors were selling. To be honest, there wasn't really much.  I almost bought one of the decorative dream catchers, but decided maybe not. I ended up not buying anything. 

Music was playing as we walked over to the food trucks. I smiled at the classic Beatles song, a band that I had loved for years. It was nice, being around people but not having to interact. To feel the general vibe of summer without having to talk to people you don't want to. 

I ended up on going with a Navajo taco from the taco truck. Mom got the same thing and we found a spot at the end of a wooden table after getting our food. 

"Not enough salsa," she chastised, pouring the small cup over her taco. 

"Could use a little more sour cream," I replied, squeezing my packet out on my own.

But the tacos ended up being delicious. We talked for a little bit, about friends and people and life in general. I closed my eyes and took in a deep breath, feeling content with the warm air around me. The buzz of the music filled me with absolute happiness. I knew that this would be one of those moments I referred back to, wishing to be here again, as I had with the boat and the lake multiple times. 

Once we had finished eating, we got strawberry Italian ice and cotton candy; pink for me, blue for my mom. It was fluffy and melted on my tongue. It turned out to be the perfect night. 

I got home with Mom and the general unhappiness ensued. My step dad, Jesse, has been out with a hurt back, so he's just been laying on the floor of our living room. Mom gets frustrated, even though she knows it's not his fault, because he's just, you know, laying there. When she's frustrated, she cleans, and when she cleans, the house is not a happy place. 

Not only that, but now I had plenty of school things to work on. I was going to be gone camping soon, so I would be missing about a week of school. Oh, wait, you thought it was summer? It is. I am taking an online gym class so I don't have to be publicly embarrassed in school. It's fairly easy, but anything that has due dates makes me stressed. 

So here we were; me stressed, Mom slightly irritated, and Jesse asleep on the ground. I couldn't blame him. Sometimes, I just wanted to roll up in a blanket and become a burrito for the rest of my life. Burritos didn't have homework or stress or random mood swings that you had no idea what they were for. 

Life as a burrito would be nice.