Aiden [Book Two]

28

Clinging to the metal bars running along the stairs, Aiden's fingers turned a bright shade of white. He was on the edge of a complete breakdown and Nathan didn't know what to do.

He'd texted Jago once already to say they would be late, but that was almost an hour ago. It had taken that long to complete the short fifteen-minute walk because the younger boy kept stopping.

Despite covering his face to hide the scar under a thick layer of make-up, Aiden frequently stopped on the street, pulling Nathan's baseball cap down to hide in its shadow. Every time a member of the public walked past, the vulnerable boy froze, clawing his fingers into his boyfriend's hand in sheer terror.

No matter how softly the elder reassured him, the smaller boy couldn't let go of the traumatic idea that everyone wanted to hurt him.

Despite listening to the deep, gravelly voice that consoled and lulled him back to reality, nausea suffocated the smaller boy, making him sick to his stomach with anxiety. Each time he stopped, it was getting harder to move again.

But the journey wasn't the only thing causing so much stress.

Meeting the boys again after what happened was intimidating. In his heart, Aiden knew the group loved him immeasurably, but he couldn't fight the multitude of voices in the back of his mind.

The blend of voices from Croydon and the mysterious bully from this time around pulled at his wounds, ripping at his heart, reminding him of every cruel word and hateful beating they inflicted on him.

How could anybody love him with that horrific scar on his face? How could they love someone so pathetic and weak?

Why would Nathan want to be with him?

Aiden tried to fight it, but the questions overpowered him.

Every step towards Jago's apartment created on overwhelming urge to run away; he wanted to run back to his room and hide under the duvet. He wanted to lock himself in the bathroom and cry until there was nothing left.

This was too soon. He was sure of it.

But Nathan had been solid the whole way.

He stopped every time the tangerine-haired boy needed a break; whispering sweet encouragement while holding his hand in the middle of the street. He straightened the navy baseball cap, brushing the orange strands away from his devastated eyes.

All the elder could do was hold his lover's hand and fight every horrifying wave, using his deep voice as a lure to keep the teen moving.

But the second they made it into Jago's building, Aiden couldn't take another step.

Breathing became near impossible as a heavy weight compressed the younger boy's chest, crushing the air from his lungs as his throat thickened. Trying to stay upright and not given in to the blanket of darkness was exhausting.

The energy drained from his body, leaving Aiden depleted, propping himself against the bannister to keep from tumbling to the ground.

Helplessness swept over Nathan like a hurricane tearing through a city, leaving nothing but destruction and carnage in its wake. His need for socialisation, forcing his boyfriend to leave the house after he practically begged to stay home, was selfish.

It ruined everything.

The fragile boy spent so much time locked away in the bedroom that the elder thought leaving for a few hours would do some good. Maybe going to a familiar, safe space like Jago's place would help him see that not everyone in the world wanted to harm him.

But it was too much. Nathan's premature and forceful pushing destroyed the minute progress they had achieved.

Aiden would never set foot outside the house again.