𝐑𝐄𝐏𝐔𝐓𝐀𝐓𝐈𝐎𝐍, benj nielsen x reader

7 | stage 1: denial

Y/N

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But I can't have a crush on Benj Nielsen.

He's made it more than clear that he has no interest in me—explicitly, with zero ambiguity. The mere idea of us being anything more than acquaintances is laughable. And yet, his laugh, the way he makes me smile even on my worst days—it's enough to drive me crazy.

No, I won't entertain the notion that I'm falling for him. But the truth is, I am. And it's a tangled, confusing mess that's threatening to overwhelm me. As Benj sits next to me, I can barely stand it. I need him to leave before I do something I'll regret.

"You need to go," I blurt out, my heart pounding with every second he stays. He frowns, confused, and I'm suddenly struck by how handsome he looks.

What on earth am I thinking?

My abruptness catches him off guard. "Why? What did I do?" he asks, genuine confusion in his voice.

I scramble for an excuse, scratching nervously at the back of my neck. "Sorry... it's just late, and I'm..." I attempt a fake yawn that turns into a real one. "I'm tired. I need to sleep," I say, standing up abruptly from the couch. I momentarily forget the pain in my knee as I try to pull myself together.

He looks more confused than ever, but he doesn't push it. "Uh... okay?" he says uncertainly. I practically shove him out the door, slamming it shut with a force that borders on desperation. I just hope I didn't come off as too rude. But the truth is, my feelings are too intense to handle.

Benj is a social reject, and I—well, I'm on the brink of becoming one, but that's beside the point. I'm [Y/N] [L/N], the popular cheerleader with straight A's, and I need to reclaim that status, especially with that hate page hanging over my head. I can't be seen as anything more than friends with Benj, not when rumors are already swirling. Besides, he's obviously not into me.

It must be the late hour messing with my head, making me think I have feelings for him. I'll sleep on it, and in the morning, everything will be back to normal.

But reality has other plans. It's Monday, and my dreams from the night before—vivid, detailed dreams of Benj—are a cruel reminder that I'm not over this. No matter how sudden and bewildering these feelings are, they're real. And I know I need to keep my distance before I fall even harder.

At school, our interactions are minimal, so Benj doesn't notice when I start avoiding him. But I know he's wondering why I ignored his texts from Sunday—something about an essay due today. My nerves are on edge as I wait for the grades in English class. When I finally check my Chromebook, I see an A-.

My jaw nearly drops. I'm filled with pride, and my first instinct is to tell—Benj. This fixation is maddening. His name, his presence, every little detail about him—it's all stuck in my head like a broken record. I can't seem to shake him, no matter how hard I try.

Benj likes Bailey, which makes my crush on him even more ridiculous. But his smile, his laugh, the way his hair falls just so—it's all so unfairly perfect.

I need a new crush. Fast.

But right now, I've got bigger problems. I've been working with Eddie on a secret mission, and we need a breakthrough on the anonymous Instagram page that's been trashing my reputation. The account's got 250 followers now, and it's getting serious.

I find Eddie talking to Connor and quickly pull him aside, giving Connor a brief smile before dragging Eddie to our usual spot in the library.

"Any progress?" I ask, leaning forward on the table, my impatience obvious.