ʙᴇ ᴍʏ ʟɪᴛᴛʟᴇ sᴇᴄʀᴇᴛ?

2. lock it up inside, gotta hide the way i feel

[spongebob narrator voice] SeVeRaL wEeKs LaTeUr

────୨ৎ────

It had been several weeks since that train ride, and things between Maddi and Alex had taken a turn. What had begun as a constant, teasing joke from Grace had gradually evolved into something more serious. They weren't officially together, but it was clear there was a lot more than friendship brewing.

Maddi found herself caught up in a whirlwind of emotions. Every time she was near Alex, her heart skipped a beat. Even the simple act of him smiling at her or brushing against her in the crowded hallways made her feel like she was floating.

But along with the joy came deep seated anxiety. Sweet as Alex was, Maddi had been through far more than her fair share of bad experiences with boys, and could never shake the feeling that she was teetering precariously on the edge of something that might end badly.

She was sitting at her usual table by the third-floor window of the library, textbooks spread out in front of her, but her mind was a million miles away. Alex had texted her earlier, suggesting they meet up for a study session in the park later. The thought of spending time with him should have been exciting, yet only deepened her unease.

Maddi's eyes drifted out the window, where the slowly setting sun cast long shadows across the coastal campus (omg alliteration who??!!). She was so spacced out that she barely noticed Grace sliding into the seat beside her.

"Maddi? You good?" Grace asked, waving her hand in front of Maddi's face.

Maddi blinked, snapping back to reality. "Yeah, yeah. I'm fine. There's just a lot on my mind."

Grace's grin widened, clearly misinterpreting Maddi's distraction.

"Is it about Aaaaaaleeeeex?" she asked in a sing-song voice, completely oblivious to Maddi's inner turmoil.

Maddi jotted down something from one of the textbooks in front of her, trying with all her might to maintain her nonchalant, distracted demeanour. "Perhaps. Perhaps not."

Grace groaned theatrically, throwing her hands up. "Fuck you and your fancy psychology mind games. I'm out!"
Maddi managed a weak smile as Grace stood up, having clearly given up on getting a straightforward answer. "Bye, Grace."
"Grace gave Maddi a final, enthusiastic wave and bounced out of the library. Maddi watched her go, flooded by a mix of relief and frustration. It was hard to not tell Grace, but deep down, Maddi knew she was doing the right thing.                                                                                                                               

With Grace gone, Maddi picked up her things and headed to the park, unable to tame the sudden rush of nerves that had come over her.

As she approached the park, she spotted Alex already sitting on a bench, waiting for her with his usual easygoing smile.

"Hey." Maddi greeted, unable to hide the tinge of anxiety in her voice.
Alex's smile melted into concern.                                              

"Are you okay? You sound stressed."

"I'm fine, don't worry." Maddi assured him.

As the study session progressed, Maddi found herself more at ease with each passing minute. The park's tranquil setting, combined with Alex's warm presence, helped ease some of her anxiety. They were working through their notes and discussing a particularly tricky topic when Maddi's thoughts began to spiral again.

She felt her heart rate increase, her palms starting to sweat as she tried to focus on the material. The familiar tightness in her chest began to creep in, and she struggled to push through it. Her breathing became shallow, and the comforting sounds of the park seemed to fade into the back