The Gray Ranch

6

FINLEY POV

"I hate to break this up, but Forest's condition needs to be addressed before you can properly get to know one another," Mom says, as Killian stares at Darcy's look alike like a deer in headlights.

Marcie leads Bella away, and I am slow to follow behind them. My instincts are telling me this is a good thing. Killian has found his mate and Darcy should be free. My wolf feels content and happy, but my heart feels as if there is a wall. After that barn conversation with Darcy, my feelings toward her seem cold. She chose him over me. Nothing else really matters at this point. No matter what Killian decides, my mate already chose and she didn't choose me.

  "Stay out here, boys," Mom says quietly as we approach her bedroom and my head clears a little.

I stop right outside their door as concern for my Dad returns full force. The issues with my mate and her husband can wait. They don't concern me anyway. Lewis comes to a halt beside me, looking anxious, and Killian stays back a little further. He seems to be in shock about the whole situation.

Mom leaves the door open behind her, and I am able to watch her as she kisses Dad's cheek before moving over so Bella can take his vitals. Their exchange is pleasant as Bella asks him how he is feeling, but Dad's expression seems tight and controlled. Either he is more worried about his condition than he let on earlier or he is uncomfortable with so many people observing his treatment.

"He looks alright," Lewis whispers suddenly breaking my fixated stare.

"He does... I think it's poison. Something is making him weak. It's either in the water or in the food," I mumble calmly and Lewis's eyes lock onto my face.

"Should I investigate," he asks sounding serious.

I shake my head. 

"No. You two should leave in a few hours. I will handle things up here. If the doctors don't find anything, I will investigate the supply chain," I whisper so Mom doesn't hear, and Killian clears his throat.

  Lewis glances over his shoulder at him and I turn toward the annoying male. My heart rate increases a little as I get both excited and frustrated with myself.

I keep telling myself their situation doesn't involve me, but I can't seem to disassociate completely.

"I... I need to stay. I want to get to know Bella. She is my mate, and I don't know... something about this place feels like home," Killian says, and I keep my face as neutral as possible.

Darcy's words about not ending her marriage just because she met her mate are echoing in my head. Her loyalty to this male is true and unwavering, but his is already broken... Was I not worth what Bella is? The evil question zips through my body and I feel as if my chest has physically cracked open.

"Umm... Yeah. That sounds like a good plan. Congratulations," I say sounding nothing like myself, but he doesn't seem to catch my tone.

  He just smirks before leaning against the wall. He looks happy and content with his choice. It's as if the decision was easy for him. Throwing away his relationship with my mate only took him a couple of minutes.

"Yeah, Congrats man. You probably should umm... You know call home. Let "everyone" know you aren't returning," Lewis says and Killian's smirk slides off his face.

  He shifts around uncomfortably and avoids meeting our eyes before he gives Lewis a nod.

"Yeah. No problem," he finally mumbles and I turn my attention back to my parents.

I need to escape this situation. Killian choices and actions are out of my control as are Darcy's. The only thing I should be focused on is my Dad. He needs me and so does my mom. Bella is already zipping up her medical bag, looking pleased with how much blood she got, so I decide it should be a good time to distance myself from Killian by going in.

"How's our patient," I ask as I enter the room and close the door behind me.

All three turn toward me with different expressions. Bella is smiling looking as if this is the best day, probably still focused on the fact she met her mate. My Mom looks just as stressed as when I arrived this morning. While Dad is looking tired and frustrated.

"His vitals are good, and the blood sample will get sent off for testing at a bigger hospital. They will check for the exact cancer that has Dr. Haynes concerned," Bella says while glancing toward Mom, whose face has lost some of its color.

Silence falls between the four of us for a second and Bella quickly excuses herself. She walks past me, no longer looking happy.

Disclosing that the Doctor now thinks it is for sure cancer probably wasn't something she wanted to do, but Mom needed to hear it. I know she was already thinking about it. It just needed to be said out loud. Dad's speech this morning had me feeling confident about his condition improving quickly, but the word cancer being spoken yet again woke me up too.

I wanted to think it was something like poison because that would be an easy fix. Something we could address. A bad guy to blame his illness on... but cancer. Cancer can't easily be fixed. There will be treatments and hospital stays. We will have to see Forest Gray grow weak...

"So what are we thinking," I ask as the door clicks once more behind me.

I want the images my brain is creating to disappear. I do not want to think about my father being truly sick. I do not want to think about my mate's husband meeting his mate. I don't want to think about the fact I wasn't good enough for my mate. I want someone to tell me what to do. I need direction so I can keep from drowning. Maybe they can tell me what to do. They always have a plan.

Mom looks at Dad and tears begin to well up in her eyes. He holds his arms out as an offering and she collapses against him like a broken child. Any hope for them pointing me in the right direction evaporates. The pain I was feeling in my chest triples at the sight of my strong mother breaking.

We are all drowning.

"We need you to stay for longer than I was thinking, Son. I knew it was possibly cancer, but it sounds like it's a sure thing... I umm well, we will just see," Dad says, sounding completely unsure for the first time in his life.

He leans his cheek against the top of Mom's head. I just nod. He doesn't need to say anything else. He and I have finally accepted that he might look okay, but he is truly sick... He might die. He might not keep the promise he made this morning.

My blood runs cold as that thought hits me, but I try to keep my expression controlled. I need to be strong. I need to be dependable. My parents have an entire town of shifters that depend on the Gray family. I can't just offer my observations up to a leader, I have to lead. I need to shut down my panic. I need to shut down the turmoil inside of me. My parents need someone like Stanley.

I can be Stanley. I can be logical. I can be that for them. They can break and be unsure for a change. I can be what they need. I can shut my emotions off.

"Get some rest. Mom you just stay here with Dad. I will get back to the office and crack down on Dad's to-do list. You two just focus on each other," I say before walking out of the room.

  When I exit the room I am surprised to see Lewis still waiting, but I keep my face blank.

Emotionless, Fin. Be emotionless. Be dependable. Be Stan.

"Lewis you can return home. Let Dan know I will be staying up here for the foreseeable future. Dr. Haynes is currently determining what cancer Dad has. When the testing is complete I am sure he will contact Dan... Be safe. The trip is risky alone," I say sounding robotic.

Lewis looks concerned, but he doesn't comment. He simply nods and gives my shoulder a quick squeeze before walking off. When he disappears from sight, the calm facial expression slides off my face, and terror replaces it. I tug at my hair as pure panic quickly overtakes my body and mind. I allow my emotions to rage and twist through my limbs for about thirty seconds before I cut them off once more. I straighten my clothes and tousle my brown hair to disguise the fact I just yanked on it. I shake out my arms and walk off toward Dad's office. I need to get started. I need to make things as easy as possible for my parents. My wolf isn't even eager to return home anymore. We are needed here.