Our Fate | Jennie x taehyung

1.

Jennie's P.O.V

    Man, I’ve never felt this worn out. It seems like every film director I meet just won’t give me the chance to show what I can do. Ever since I was a kid, I dreamed of being an actress, stepping into the spotlight and living the life I always pictured, where money isn’t an issue and I’m free to do what I want. But the reality? Yeah, it’s been way off from that dream.

    I grew up in a pretty loveless place without parents to help me figure things out. Honestly, I don’t even know if my dad is out there; there’s just this emptiness where he should be. My mom passed away when I was super young, around five or seven, I think. My memories of her are all fuzzy, and I can’t even picture her face clearly.

    After she died, my aunt, my mom’s sister took me in. But let me tell you, it was anything but cozy. I was basically raised by someone who seemed to thrive on being cruel. She had no kindness and treated me like I was just a hassle, often worse than a dog.

     My childhood was a nonstop cycle of fear and not having enough. I’d have to clean the whole house without any food, and I had zero access to clean clothes. Water was all I had when she wasn’t around, and sneaking out for food was always terrifying. Getting caught meant facing her awful temper that could quickly turn violent.

      Sometimes, I wonder if she was even human or something way more twisted because her cruelty felt endless and completely uncalled for. Once, she chillingly told me that my suffering brought her joy, a line that still creeps me out.

     How can someone actually enjoy another person's pain? I often wrestled with that thought, searching for answers that just wouldn’t come.

    But through all that darkness, I’m grateful for one thing: she let me go to school. I can’t imagine what my life would’ve been like if I hadn’t gotten an education. School was my only getaway, a brief break from the chaos at home. In those classrooms, I allowed myself to dream about a future where I could escape my past and finally chase my acting passion.

   I remember when kids used to whine and complain about going to school, saying it felt boring and like jail. But for me, school was like a dream come true! Every day, stepping through those doors felt like entering a world where my dreams were within reach. Even if I was by myself, I believed with hard work and determination, I could turn my dreams into reality.

    Now, at 23, I find myself at a bit of a crossroads. Unfortunately, I had to leave college because I couldn't afford the tuition fees. But you know what? I’m determined to see this setback as temporary; I will continue my education and eventually hit those goals!

     At the moment, I'm on the lookout for a job to help with my bills and apartment rent. This past year has been tough. I lost my aunt, someone I found it hard to think of as 'aunt,' due to cancer. She battled addiction, which deeply affected her mental health.

      When I heard the news from the doctor, I didn’t react right away. Part of me felt sad because, despite the challenges between us, she was my mother’s sister. But another part of me felt relieved; I wouldn’t have to deal with her tumultuous influence or unsolicited advice anymore.

       You might wonder why I didn’t speak up or try to escape her grasp. Honestly, I was just too young and naive back then. As time went on, what I endured became a part of my everyday life. I got used to the yelling, the occasional physical confrontations, and the emotional ups and downs.

     It hurts to reflect on those days, but now, after six months since my aunt's passing, I genuinely feel free! I’m living on my own, though my dear friend Kai has been there with me through it all.