Prisoners of Prophecy

Chapter 14

Melany - Tuesday, July 16th, 2019; 8:06am

     I woke up, startled. My breathing came in harsh, ragged gasps. My side burned. It was the same feeling as running without pause, pushing on even though your body and your lungs screamed for mercy. Adrenaline pulsed under my skin like electricity, causing me to tremble. I was covered in a sheen of sweat; it ran down my face like tears. I could not remember my dream or if I had even been dreaming at all, but this odd sense of being chased had followed me into the waking world. I glanced around wildly, waiting for something to emerge from its hiding place and swallow me whole.
     Slowly, my racing heart calmed. My cramped muscles relaxed. That debilitating fear subsided. The thought of being watched - of being preyed on - drifted from my mind. It was a serene moment, but a short one.
     That dream I couldn't recall was insubstantial in comparison to my reality. It crashed down upon me, an avalanche of questions and unreal possibilities that constantly evolved and disappeared and were replaced before I could hardly comprehend them. I thought of Ashley, of the shadows that mangled her - the shadows that were still here. Waiting. I thought of how odd the school was - the masked guards, the stares the students gave me, and how empty, even abandoned, it seemed when the sun went down. I thought of the night before. Of Calypso. The way her touch sent a lethal combination of agony and euphoria through me that made my head reel with confusion. Even the memory of the feeling made me long for it again. I thought of the horrible way Calypso had found herself here, and wondered about how the rest of them had gotten into ShadowWood. I thought of Xantara. Was she even human? There was a doubt in me that she was, despite how preposterous it seemed.
     I couldn't get my mind off of the range of impossibilities that had become my life. They battered my brain roughly, left it throbbing. There were so many things I could not answer, and the more that I considered them the crazier that I felt. Would being here long enough eventually make me snap? I thought it would. I felt on the verge of it now.
     Without much thought at all, I got up. My feet carried me to Xantara's door seemingly of their own accord. I knocked. My head buzzed with things that I once thought would have never existed out of the realm of my imagination. I couldn't bear it any longer. I needed an explanation.
     "Who's that?" Her voice came from somewhere inside. Even though it was muffled, it strangely soothed me. Like it was the familiar voice of a family member, or a close friend. I supposed it was.
     "It's Melany. Can I come in?"
     There was a moment of silence. "I...uh..." She paused. When she spoke again, she sounded emotionless, as if she were trying to hide the hope I thought I had heard in her tone just a moment ago. "What do you want?"
     I remember her telling me only a few days ago to avoid her. And the dream - no, memory - I had had that night. I recalled that same hope in Xantara's eyes when I had told her I didn't think I could avoid her, even if I tried. "I need to talk to you," I said, resting my forehead on the cool wooden door.
     "I don't think it's a good time. I'm feeling a bit sick."
     I heard the lie in her tone so clearly it was almost like she had told me right after that what she had said wasn't true at all. "You're not sick," I responded confidently. "You're afraid of scaring me away. Because your scars are getting worse. Like you're healing backwards."
     Xantara didn't speak. But, I could feel her shock as if it were my own.
     "I know who you are, Xantara. Just let me in."
     A couple of seconds passed before she slowly, hesitantly, opened the door. I never would have known I could read so many things in complete and utter black. Her eyes swam with both terror and hope; those emotions clawed into my own heart and lingered there. The scars that started at the corners of her lips and stretched almost to her ears were not even there a few days ago. Now, they were scabbed up and the skin around them was red and irritated.
     I couldn't suppress my gasp. Xantara winced and took a step back as if I had reached out and struck her. That dream that seemed to never leave my head consumed me for a moment, forcing its way to the front of my mind. There was no denying that she was the same little girl who had just appeared beneath my bed one terrible night. I was suddenly flooded with the same relief I had had as a child, when I learned I was no longer alone. That I had someone to count on when things got rough.
     "Just because you know who I am doesn't mean that your sanity can -"
     Without thinking, I threw my arms over her neck and pulled her into a hug. Like it was instinct, her arms wrapped around my waist and held me tight. It wasn't at all like Calypso's touch - in fact, it was almost the opposite. The energy pouring from her skin into my veins was not painful. It was just as strange, though, like she was full of electricity and was transferring it to me in short but powerful bursts. I did not feel like I desperately needed it, like an addict who's run out of their favorite drug. I wanted it, though, because it enveloped me in a soothing warmth that was the closest thing to home that I had felt in a very long time.
     When I pulled away from her comforting embrace, I noticed there were tears pooling into the corners of Xantara's coal - black eyes, threatening to spill over. She blinked hard to keep them at bay, but her voice shook. "Do you really know?"
     I nodded. "What I can understand, at least."
     "Are you sure?" The desperation in her tone pierced my heart. "Was it that dream you were talking about?"
     "Yeah, that." I felt as if I was both relieving myself of some of the weight on my shoulders and driving myself more insane with every word. "I remembered how we met. You came out of nowhere, like you were born of the shadows under my bed. Do you remember that?"
     A single tear escaped and ran down her cheek. When it passed over the wound on her face, it came away tinted pink. She seemed unable to speak, could only nod.
     "I... I created you. Somehow, in some way. That's what you told me that day. You said you were my imaginary friend. I created you and you came from my thoughts like I were Zeus and you Athena." I put a hand to my forehead for a moment, covering my eyes as if it would change the madness coming from my mouth. I looked back up to see Xantara watching me sympathetically. "This doesn't make sense," I sighed.
     "But you're still..." Xantara tapped the side of her head with a finger. "Here?"
     "For the most part," I admitted. "Though I never would have expected something like this could happen, I haven't lost it. Not yet. I'm not even that scared anymore, not right now. I just wish I knew more."
     Xantara studied me with dark eyes that brimmed with hesitant excitement. "I don't believe this is what usually happens," she murmured quietly.
     "What do you mean by that?"
     Wordlessly, she grabbed my hand and pulled me through the doorway and closed the door behind me. Then, she dragged me to a couch that was different than the one in my room but equally as old and worn. We both sat down.
     Despite what I had said just a moment ago, I was suddenly engrossed with an undeniable terror. The time had come where I'd finally learn more of Xantara's place in my past. I could see it in her doubtful expression. My clammy hands began to shake. Unease settled heavily across my shoulders. What will she say? I wondered. How would it affect me? Would I lose my mind, like Xantara had seemed so sure would happen?
     She sighed heavily. "I don't know much more about our past than you do. It gets harder to remember as time passes. But I've been having dreams. And I think they have something to do with the life before ShadowWood that I hardly know anymore.
     "I guess I can start with how I got here. What I know, at least." She took a trembling breath. She had not yet let go of my hand, and I squeezed her's reassuringly. "I never knew my real parents. They found me at the door of an orphanage when I was around four. No one wanted me. No one hardly even talked to me. Apparently I ran away a lot. I recall sometimes telling the people who worked there of memories that I swore were mine."
     "But they weren't?"
     Xantara shook her head slowly. "They couldn't have been. All I can tell you for sure is that in a lot of those memories I was older than I had actually been. Like I was reminiscing on someone else's past. I would tell everyone who'd listen. They even assigned me a therapist. No one believed me, or even tried to help. They probably just thought I was either lying or crazy. The other kids would bully me a lot."
     She peeled her gaze from mine and looked down into her lap. Her tone had lowered and was full of guilt and sadness. "I can't remember it actually happening. Maybe that's why I'm here and not rotting in prison. They think we're all nuts, you know?
     "I don't even know who it was. Or why I did it. All I know from my trial was that her name was Jamie and that I bludgeoned her to death with a paperweight from her desk."
     When her eyes finally met mine again, the pain there turned my horror into sympathy instantly. Part of me wanted so badly to be afraid of her, even disgusted by her. It would make more sense if I was. Someone capable of such depravity should be someone to run from. So why couldn't I? Sure, the regret, even hatred of her actions, was obvious on her face. Could even murderers be forgiven? Could they change?
     I thought briefly of Calypso, and how easy it was to also dismiss the morbid acts that had brought her here. It would be wrong to judge the rest of them differently. Wouldn't it?
     "You mentioned something about dreams you've been having?" I asked her, desperate to focus on anything else but the fact that this seemingly kind and gentle woman was a killer. "What about those?"
     She massaged her temple with her free hand, wincing as if her head had suddenly started to ache. "They are confusing. I'm not sure what they mean, if they mean anything at all. But dreams have had a different meaning for me here at ShadowWood. I think you understand that.
"The past few nights I've been having dreams where I'll see a bunch of faces flash by. I couldn't put a name to any of them, or any memories that I've had with them... But when I wake up, I wake up sure that I know them. Which only makes that look on all of their faces more concerning to me."
"What do they look like?"
"They looked afraid. Terrified. Like they were on the verge of going mad."
I thought of one of the first things she asked me since I came to her room. She seemed to be worried that all I had learned would drive me over the brink of sanity. Or was it something more than that?
Before I could ask the question I had yet to figure out how to word, Xantara continued, as if she could sense my confusion. "I know this sounds crazy..."
"It all does," I assured her.
She nodded in agreement before going on. "I don't know how you were able to change my appearance, much less how I found myself in your room. I don't know how you could have created me when I had a life before you and after you. I can't remember anything that would help," she scoffed. "But, I don't know, some part of me is sure that those people and you are connected. Somehow."
"And that was why you were worried I'd lose it if I really knew how we met?" I finally found my voice.
"I have no reason to think that, but yes. I just feel like...This is different. From what, I haven't a clue." She shook her head vigorously as if to clear it. "I wish things made more sense."
"So do I," I murmured. Her answers had only brought more questions.
"There's something we can't comprehend here with us at this school. I know that much. And we will be getting answers. Soon."
"How do you know that?" I asked, her mysterious words sparking my interest.
"I don't want to tell you too many things, that might scare you too much. Or worse, drive you crazy. We're going to have to count on each other's rationality."
"We?" I questioned, though I already knew from Calypso. A part of me hoped that a different answer would put holes in the story and make it easier to not believe. "All of us?"
"Yeah. All of us."
Though I had first detested the group for the meaning of their bracelets, feeling as if I had been unfairly placed with people I was not like, the knowledge that I wasn't alone in this soothed me. Now, I was sure that they were not the vile people I had assumed they were. They were just a product of something strong enough to alter fate itself.
     "I know. This is ridiculous. It doesn't feel real," Xantara cooed in a comforting tone. "But I think we may have a fighting chance. We were picked for this." She cleared her throat after a brief pause. "Maybe you should go to your room and get your thoughts together."
     I nodded, my mind somehow feeling both so full that it may explode as well as void of anything but utter helplessness. I let her pull me to my feet, holding the hand she hadn't let go of since we had sat down. She walked me to the door.
     She gave me a short but tight hug that sent a wave of warmth through me. "I'll see you soon."
     When she shut the door behind me, the hallway seemed to be much too dark and much too quiet.
     Then, I noticed that my own door was open just enough that I could see a sliver of light coming from inside. I must have forgotten to shut it, I tried to convince myself. It was easy to believe in the numb state I had fallen into; a natural reaction I had learned when I was very young. I walked into my room.
     Calypso was sprawled out on the love seat. That blessed numbness disappeared instantly. The fake black leather made her pale skin look almost white, flawless. The lingering and familiar feeling of Xantara's presence was replaced by the almost unbearable desire to feel that stunning agony Calypso's touch had sent through me last night. I took a clumsy step forward, even as I tried to shove off that temptation, and to take in her perfection like it was keeping me alive. I was both disgusted and horrified of the way she was able to steal all of my attention, seemingly without even realizing.
    All of us, Xantara's words echoed in my mind. I think that we may have a fighting chance. What could that possibly mean?
     She sat up and looked at me, her head cocked to the side and a playful smirk forming on her full lips. "Have a habit of leaving your door unlocked, do you?"
     "I'll make sure to break that habit." I tried to sound confident, but my voice came out trembling and weak.
     "Oh?" She raised a pale eyebrow. "So you weren't pleased with the surprise?" she teased.
     I hung my head, both in defeat and in an attempt to hide the fact that I was now blushing furiously. Despite the strange longing for things I couldn't explain and the want to push it away, it was a pleasant sight - finding her waiting for me in my room. Does she know? I wondered, not for the first time. About the way her very existence is maddeningly tempting?
     "Why are you here?" I mumbled under my breath, afraid to meet her gaze but unable to stop myself.
     Calypso stood up and glided towards me so smoothly it was as if her feet never touched the ground. Standing tantalizingly close to me and piercing me with her light gray eyes, she became as intimidating as she was gorgeous. The urge to reach out and touch her, to see if that same electricity would flow through my veins, was almost impossible to resist. Being so near to her, I came to a conclusion. She did know what she did to me - to everyone. And I think she enjoyed it. But, that confident and amused smile did not completely hide what looked to me her own wistful longing and dull confusion at the feeling of it. Longing of what, I had no clue, but that emotion in her eyes sent chills all over me regardless.
     "Do I need a reason?" She mumbled softly.
     Her voice caused my heartbeat to stutter, and forcing myself to stay calm physically drained me. "Yeah, I'd like one. Since you came in here without me knowing and all."
     Her smile grew, her eyes sparking with interest and even surprise. "I apologize about that," she said, still grinning brightly. "Just came to see how you were."
     "I'm fine," I muttered. "Could have knocked for that."
     She laughed, and it was the most beautiful sound I'd ever heard. "What's the fun in that?" She waved a hand dismissively. "I'll leave you alone now. Oh, one more thing. I wanted to invite you to our next meeting, if Xantara hasn't yet. I suggest you come."
     And then she was gone.