What about us?

Chapter 8- the embarrassment i am.

It was now Friday evening; finally. I blabbered on, to my mum about how school was and this, that and other (the usual).
"Today was once again another boring day apart from lunch with friends. I got the odd death stare from Lulu and double geography but apart from that Friday was alright." I said spinning my spaghetti around my fork.
"Oh, Lulu's that horrible girl you were telling me about yesterday wasn't it. I'm really glad you are coming out of your shell indigo and making friends. I know I should tell you this more often but I'm really proud." Mum leaned in for a hug over the table opening out her arms.
I embraced in a hug as I smelled the familiar scent of my mum's perfume and the lavender washing up powder which gave me a sense of comfort.
"I thought it would be nice to visit next door after what happened to Milly. Nothing crazy-we won't be there long."
"But you know that me and Max aren't going to great at the moment Mum. He hates me." I sighed.
"Eh, I thought you made up ages ago!" Mum said looking confused.
"Well I thought so too." I looked to the side out of the window.
"We are going in a bit." My mum said, beginning to clear away the bowls and cutlery from the table.
"Wait. Now?" I questioned.
"Yes."
I sighed trudging up the stairs to my room.
"So I take it you won't be helping me wash up the pots then?" Mum shouted as her voice echoed around the house.
"Fine. I'll do it."

I slowly dried up the pots, drying away lightly.
"Oh come on Indigo. That's pathetic; do it properly." My mum giggled as she hummed away, drying up the pots too.

We had finished washing up and I stumbled to my room to get changed into some flare jeans, and I needed something which looked fashionable so I rummaged around my overflowing draw of tops. I pulled out a small, silk white top with lace added to the top of it. I only just wriggled into it after checking the size. It was age twelve and I'm fifteen- oh well, at least it fit. I felt a bit exposed in the tiny top and added my light, floral cardigan. I sat at my vanity as my mum said we were leaving in five minutes. I brushed through my hair and embellished my ears with some studded pearl ear rings which bearing in mind took forever to put on. I curled my lashes and added some concealer under my eyes. I also applied some pink tinted lip gloss. I fumbled around my school cardigan pockets to find my rings I had taken off the day before when I noticed mr Umber (my science teacher) walking down the corridor and I knew for sure that he would confiscate them from me. I don't even know how it is allowed. Imagine me walking up to a stranger and asking to take their jewellery from them. That's basically what it's like because in reality I don't really know the teachers which surround me everyday in school. How am I supposed to trust them. If it isn't there's and if I never asked them to take it, that's practically stealing.
"Indigo! We're going now so get your shoes on." Mum called as she jingled the keys in her hands.
"Okay." I slipped on my black converse and tied the laces which were now fraying.
I walked to my mum as she frowned, looking down at my shoes.
"You could do with some new laces Indigo, in fact new shoes! Are you sure your feet aren't cramped up in those converse?"
"But you know how much I love my converse." I argued as my mum rummaged around her bag, pulling out a tennis ball, a lipstick, a sock, a packet of tissues then a pen.
"Ah ha. I knew I had a pen in here somewhere." My mum said whilst I stood gawping at her.
"Are you sure you didn't steal Mary popping bag? You have all sorts in there." I giggled.
"Anyway, as I was saying, i'll buy you a new pair of trainers. As much as you love your converse, I think it's time for a new pair- possibly even better than your trainers you have on right now."
"No mum honestly. I'll save up my pocket money and I'll do some chores and even get a job to earn some money to buy some shoes myself."
"You are a funny one Indigo. I'll buy you some shoes, you save your pocket money for hanging out with friends and going up town. End of discussion." My mum opened the stationary cupboard and pulled out a card which read 'best wishes' in a swirly font with tulips of different colours in the background. Mum always found a place for everything in our house.
"Anyway, I'm writing this card for Milly before we go. Could you write something in the card too; just a small note, I'm sure she'll really appreciate it."
I carefully swirled my writing down onto the page and flicked my y's. This is what I wrote:

To Milly Boils,
I'm sending you best wishes and Im looking forward to seeing you now that you have recovered.
Lots of love and hugs,
Indigo xxx


"Awww, that's lovely Indigo." My mum smiled as she slipped the card into an envelope and wrote Milly on the front of the card in her clumsy, big handwriting.
"Right then, we best be off." Mum said as she held the door open with one foot whilst reaching for the card on the shelf to put into her faded, green leather bag.
I nodded with a smile as I stepped foot onto the cobbled stepping stones which lead to the gate. The fence which ran across the side of the front garden was rather low. On the other side was Max's house so i carefully stepped on a large stone in the corner to boost me up then hopped right over.
"Oh indigo! Won't your clothes be all dirty now; you do that every time." My mum sighed with a chuckle.

"Hello Indigo. Were you getting told of by your Mummy?" Jodie looked up at me as I jumped over onto the grass.
"No, not really. She just didn't want me to get my clothes dirty and I didn't." I said giving Jodie (Max's sister) a twirl.
"Yes you did! You are so silly!" Jodie chuckled.
"Where?" I questioned.
"Bird poopy on the front of your top. That top looks very nice but it would be even nicer without the poopy stain." Jodie chortled pointing.
"Oh indigo." Mum said as she closed the gate, walking toward me. "Go back and change your top now!" My mum said with an angry tone.
I went to jump over the fence as mum said, "through the gate this time."
As I walked towards the gate I could hear giggles coming from Jodie and my mum.
I ran to the door realising I forgot to get the key off my mum- I trudged back next door and opened the sliding doors into the neighbours kitchen.
"You forgot the keys didn't you." Mum said waving them in her hands.
"Lovely little message indigo in the card. Thank you sweetie." Milly crinkled a smile.
I smiled back as I went to give her a hug.
"Mum I'm going to have to go back again now to get changed." I sighed.
"Indigo, you can borrow one of Jodie's tops if you want and if they don't fit you can have a rummage around Max's clothes for a top. Max is at football training so if you want you can just wait in his room for him." Milly said.
I would probably squeeze into one of Jodie's tops but I didn't really want Max to turn up from football training with me in a neon cartoon top on so I figured that wearing one of Max's tops would be best.
"Thank you Milly. I'll go upstairs now and see what I can find to put on." I walked off into the hallway and up the stairs. Max's house was the same model of our house and his room is where my room is laid out in my house. My mums office is laid out as Jodie's room in the Boils family's home. Max's room was surprisingly tidy for a teenage boy; I figured that Milly had tidied it for him. I rummaged around his endless amount of draws and cupboards to finally find a draw full of tops and jumpers. I pulled out a navy blue jack wills hoodie. I removed my stained silk top- it was probably a sign to get rid of it anyway as seen as it just about fit me and was probably small enough to fit Jodie. I removed the top as it revealed my lace bralet I literally live in because of how comfy it is but I love how grown up it makes me feel. I adjusted my bralet's twisted straps in the mirror. I felt a gust of wind come from the door as I looked up. He was standing right in front of me. Here I was in front of him, in my tiny lace bralet. My jeans and my bralet. Shit. I let out a squeal of embarrassment as I reached for his hoodie, holding it close to my chest.
"Didn't your mum say I was in here!" I said, my face flushed.
"No." Max smirked.
"Do you find this funny?" I questioned.
"No, sorry. Just shocked. I know the door was shut but the last thing I expected was for my neighbour to be half dressed in my room so of course I went in. Besides, I always have my door shut so how would I know." Max started to sound panicked.
"It's fine. Oh, do you mind if I borrow this jumper for now? A bird left a little surprise for me on my shirt. Your mum said I could borrow one of your tops." I said.
"Oh yeah sure. I'd much rather you wear something." Max laughed.
"I forgot for a minute that we hated each other." I said pulling the top over my head.
"Well. We will never be as close as we used to be but that's fine." Max said as he chucked his football on the floor as he turned to the door to hang his coat on the peg.
Does this have to get anymore embarrassing i thought to myself with a jumper suffocating me.
"A little help please. Your jumper is stuck around my earring ." My muffled voice said.
"Yeah right." Max didn't turn around.
"Max I'm not messing!" I shouted with the hoodie covering my mouth and nose and top of my head, only my eyes visible or clearly not to Max...
were my eyes visible enough for him? because he turned his head and gave a long stare at the top half of my body. His eyes were especially fixated on my chest. I gulped and didn't say anything. That would be very embarrassing for him. He obviously didn't want me to notice his eyes admiring my body.
"Well take my earring out for me because I clearly can't. Look my hand are up here." I waved my hands which were above my head from getting caught in the jumper from the effort of putting the jumper on.
"Okay." He said just standing there.
"Well come on. Don't just stand there. I would much rather have the jumper on rather than be stood here half dressed." I said.
"There. I've fixed it. Now can you please put the jumper on." Max said.
"Well you looked like you would prefer me without it on." I said, quickly smacking my mouth with my hands.
Max went red.
"Sorry, it just slipped out but I saw you look at me like that. No boy's ever looked at me like that before."
"I'm going for a shower." Max walked out of the room like nothing happened. Well I would much rather that than have him screaming at me.
I slipped the hoodie on and picked up ornaments around his room, observing each and every one of them. I suddenly came across a doodle covered blue notebook I turned it over and ran my hand across his doodles. I opened the first crinkled page...

This is what was written in the notebook:

My thoughts:
From the bottom of my heart i know me and Kerry aren't meant for each other. I always used to tell Kerry I'd love her forever. I guess forever was shorter than I expected. Indigo used to make it so obvious she liked me but I think she just gave up now on making an effort to flirt with me and hold my hand. I don't know If Indigo likes me anymore. I was so selfish and always thought about myself. Now that I think of It, it was always about me and never about Indigo, i always brought her down when she made an effort just because I was jealous and when she was right about Kerry I got annoyed because I knew she was right. And turns out she was right about Kerry because Kerry is a bitch for sleeping with my mate. I'm so glad I don't date her anymore. When I told Kerry I loved her I was lying. She now means nothing to me. I'm so pissed i didn't open my eyes sooner and notice how beautiful Indigo is. She's always been the one there for me. She's always the one who makes me laugh and no matter how shit my day goes, even talking to Indigo for a minute makes everything seem perfect again. If only someone noticed how valuable this girl is. She is perfect truly. She Is a gift. I'm so lucky I have a friend like her. But I don't want to be friends. I want the be more than a friend. The few chapters of my life I've spent with Indigo will forever be my favourite chapters.

I read the paragraph over and over until I heard the bathroom door open. I placed the notebook back on the bookshelf, exactly where I left it. I hid the smile which was painted across my face as Max opened the door- a towel around his waist and a chain around his neck. A flutter entered my stomach as I noticed Max's curly, wet hair. Why are boys with wet hair so much more hot. Max was already picture perfect but with wet hair it just made him look one million more times hot.
"Are you just going to stand there and gawp at me or get out and let me get changed." Max said, giggling.
"Oh, umm." I swiftly walked out the room covering my flushed red face.