𝐊𝐞𝐞𝐩𝐞𝐫 || 𝐕𝐞𝐫𝐊𝐰𝐚𝐧

Chapter 23

Vernon hadn’t expected Seungkwan to come right out and admit to his Keeper nature. He didn’t give it a name, so he didn’t know what it was, but it proved to Vernon that he knew he was doing it. He just didn’t know how or why. And he worried it would be used to manipulate him, which wasn’t an unreasonable fear, given Seungkwan’s history.

“My turn,” he said softly. “Dutchy and Andy were two members of our pack—our omega anchor and our beta linker. They were killed alongside Suho in that mission I told you about. Suho was our leader, and he was an alpha. He called the shots, took his own chances. But Dutchy and Andy… my role was to protect them, to allow them to do their jobs safely.”

“What happened?”

Vernon swallowed hard and forced the words out.

“They were in a bunker, a sealed chamber, underground. I was at the entrance, keeping it clear, and watching their backs. I… I can’t share the details, but the simple truth is, we had to blow the place up. My job was to seal the door, to protect the structure above us that was full of civilians. Suho stayed behind to make sure it went up, sent Dutchy and Andy out… but they got caught in a firefight on the way. They didn’t make it in time. They were ten feet away when I had to seal the door. They reached it just before the place went up.”

He took a deep, shuddering breath at that, remembering the thump of hands hitting the door, their shouts. A hundred times, he’d imagined their faces—the horror and betrayal in their eyes in that split second before the explosion raged.

“What would have happened if you’d waited for them?”

“I’d never have gotten the door sealed on time. We’d all have died. The floor above us would have collapsed, killed a bunch of other people.” And what was in that bunker might have become airborne, and the world as they knew it would have ended. That part, he could never, ever say out loud. The world could never know how close it came to disaster.

“Sounds like you were a hero,” Seungkwan murmured. “Isn’t that what heroes do? Make the hard choices, sacrifice the few for the many?”

“I felt like a fraud when they pinned another medal to my chest,” Vernon admitted. “I should have gone in after them when they ran into trouble, helped get them out.”

“But then who would have been there to seal the door?”

Seungkwan posed the question Vernon always asked himself when the doubts grew too big.

“We might have gotten out in time.”

“And you might not. I don’t have much experience with making the hard decisions, but this sounds like one of those. I know you feel you had choices, could have done things differently. But I think maybe you didn’t, you know?”

“Yeah,” Vernon said, tired of it all but craving the absolution Seungkwan’s words offered. “Maybe I didn’t.”

He pressed his face to Seungkwan’s back and tried not to think too hard.

“Sleep, Kwan. You’re safe. I’ve got your back.”

He was a Protector. Though he sometimes lost sight of that, it was still who he was, inside and out.

They woke to the sound of a phone ringing. Vernon lifted his head and peered around, on alert but his mind fuzzy. Where…? Oh, right. Seungkwan’s room.

The events of the night before came back to him as Seungkwan pushed free from his arms and reached for his phone on the nightstand, silencing it.

After a moment, he picked it up, blinking at the screen before groaning.