The love we can't have...

The shadow in my heart.

⚠️lgbtq+ included⚠️
⚠️sad⚠️
⚠️mentions of ab*se⚠️
⚠️controlling partner⚠️

Siobhan
________

I go home, I drop to the floor before I go to see Roger. He'll go rough again. I know it. (Stop you dirty minded buggar) I still have bruises on my arms from the last time.

It hurts so much every time. I try to relax and think of the other stuff. Like, I'm now rich and, and, Vivian. No. Stop that. Roger won't let me go anyways, why bother asking and ending up with another beating. I don't want to get hit with the bat again.

I then crumbled up the paper and threw it across the room, I breath in and then stand back up while tears drip down my face,but I drop right back down to the floor.

I open my eyes and wipe the floor with my hand, my heart is racing faster than rap god, tears are dripping and I have to keep wiping the floor to make it dry.

I hear the stairs.

"Mummy, you here~~" he's drunk...
Wait. HES DRUNK!!!!! I love it when he's drunk he acts so.. weird? But he doesn't hit me!
"Yes, Rog?" I only call him Rog when he's drunk, he comes to me and gives a big hug. Oh! He's never done that before..? Oh he's asleep?

I took him upstairs and put him to bed, then ran downstairs to try and find the piece of paper I threw,
Where is it? Oh no! I can't find it! No, no, no, no, no!

I drop to the floor so my knees go just under my eyes. I cry and cry. Feeling hopeless. My 1 try! Vanished, gone! I wasted it, all because of that stupid man! I wanna choke him!

I run upstairs, being as quiet as can be. I take a look at the bat choices. The bat with spikes all over, the bat with forks all over and the most painful one, the bat with SHARP knifes all over. I use the one with sharp knifes.

I storm quietly - so I don't wake him in the process- into his (our) room. I stand next to him Not going on the bed. I put the bat above my head. I close my eyes ready for blood to squirt at me, I hesitate.. no! I can do this! I start to lower my bat but stop right before it gets to him. I cant do this.

:FLASHBACK:
A flashback crosses my mind, my mum. I could only see her shadow.. she's holding something. Dad? Dads screaming? Why's he on the ground? I could only see the shadow but his shadow was low so I knew. Dads stopped screaming? Where's the thing my mum was holding? I go out from just seeing the shadow and see what was really happening. My mum was a cannibol! (Eats humans/their own kind). She was eating my dad. That was the moment I packed my stuff and ran away. I also wore my father's necklace he got for me. It has a green gem at the end of it. I still wear it to this day. I jumped out of my window, I put aLOT of pillows underneath so I was fine, I've never seen my mum or dad since. I'm glad.

:END OF FLASHBACK:

No! I would never be like her, I put my bat back and go back downstairs to get a cup of coffee, maybe that'll help me.

My heart is now drowning in its shadow.

Sorry this chapter is kinda bad.
Didn't wanna make drunk r**er REALLY bad so I made him sound good. Also there's probably young users reading so yeah.
Anyways sorry I didn't include Vivian in this one so yeah. Also some Siobhan backstory (theory)!
BYEEEE
-JasKisses.0
- Jas Rio Merrifield