The therapist secret

Chapter 19

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Layla spent the next few days walking around in a daze. It was as though a part of her had shut down, leaving her on autopilot. She went to work, sorted through vinyl records, and chatted with customers, but her mind was elsewhere—stuck in that room with Bella, in the space where everything between them had shattered.

She tried not to think about the last session, about Bella's pained expression or the finality in her voice when she told her it was over. But the memory clung to her, refusing to let go.

Layla had never been good at sitting with her feelings, and now was no exception. She sought out distractions—texted old friends, watched mindless TV, even went out for drinks with the guy from the bar, though the entire time her mind was miles away. Every drink felt hollow. Every conversation a waste of words. No matter how much she tried to forget, she couldn't escape the gnawing emptiness that had settled in her chest.

It was Bella's absence that hurt the most.

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Two weeks later, Layla found herself wandering aimlessly through the city, her feet carrying her toward Bella's office before she even realized where she was going. She stopped a few blocks away, staring at the building, her heart pounding.

She didn't know why she was here. There was nothing left to say. Bella had made her decision. But standing there, just a few streets away, she felt the pull—an invisible thread tugging at her, urging her to go inside, to face whatever this was.

Without thinking, she crossed the street, her steps quickening as she neared the building. But as she reached the door, she hesitated. The familiar ache settled in her chest, and for a moment, she considered turning back. Walking away. Leaving it all behind.

But then she saw her.

Bella was stepping out of the building, her expression distant, eyes lost in thought. She hadn't noticed Layla yet, and for a second, Layla froze. She watched as Bella paused on the sidewalk, glancing down at her phone before slipping it into her bag. There was a heaviness to her movements, like she was carrying something invisible, something Layla recognized all too well.

"Bella," Layla called out, her voice cutting through the quiet evening.

Bella stopped, her head snapping up in surprise. For a moment, they just stood there, a few feet apart, staring at each other. Layla's heart pounded in her chest, her pulse loud in her ears. She didn't know what she was expecting, but Bella's guarded expression told her everything she needed to know.

"Layla," Bella said softly, her voice a mix of surprise and hesitation. "What are you doing here?"

Layla stepped closer, her words tumbling out before she could stop them. "I don't know. I just... I needed to see you."

Bella looked down, her brows furrowed as though she was fighting some internal battle. When she looked up again, there was a sadness in her eyes that made Layla's chest tighten. "Layla, we can't—"

"I know," Layla interrupted, her voice cracking slightly. "I know we can't. But I can't stop thinking about you. About us. About what happened."

Bella sighed, her shoulders slumping slightly as she looked away. "It was a mistake, Layla. I shouldn't have let things get this far. I should've stopped it before it even began."

Layla's throat tightened, her frustration bubbling to the surface. "But it *did* begin. You can't just pretend it didn't happen."

"I'm not pretending," Bella said quietly, her voice steady but filled with an emotion Layla couldn't quite place. "I know it happened. But that doesn't mean it should have."

Layla shook her head, her emotions swirling into a mess of anger and sadness. "You keep saying that, but I don't believe you. I know you felt something too."

Bella's eyes flickered with something—guilt, maybe, or regret—but she didn't deny it. Instead, she looked away, her voice barely above a whisper. "It doesn't matter."

"It matters to me," Layla shot back, her frustration spilling over. "You're the only thing that makes sense right now. You're the only person I—" She stopped herself, the words catching in her throat.

Bella looked at her, her expression softening. "Layla, you deserve more than this. You deserve someone who can give you everything you want, someone who isn't tangled up in ethics and boundaries."

"I don't care about the rules," Layla said, her voice pleading now. "I care about you."

Bella flinched slightly, the words hitting her harder than Layla expected. For a long moment, neither of them spoke. The air between them was thick with everything they weren't saying, with every feeling they were too scared to admit. And yet, it was all there—hanging in the silence, palpable and undeniable.

Finally, Bella took a step closer, her voice soft but firm. "I care about you too, Layla. That's why I have to do this. I can't... I can't be what you need. Not like this."

Layla's heart sank, her hope crumbling with every word. She could feel the finality in Bella's tone, the resignation in her eyes. "So that's it? You're just walking away?"

Bella's gaze softened, and for a moment, she looked like she might reach out, like she might bridge the space between them. But then she stepped back, shaking her head. "I'm not walking away. I'm letting go."

The words hit Layla like a punch to the gut, and for a moment, she couldn't breathe. Letting go. It sounded so simple, but the weight of it was unbearable.

"I'm sorry," Bella whispered, her voice thick with emotion. "I wish things were different."

Layla blinked back the tears stinging her eyes, her chest tight with the ache of everything unsaid. She wanted to fight, to argue, to make Bella see that this wasn't the end. But looking at her now, Layla knew that no amount of words would change anything.

Bella had made her choice.

With a heavy heart, Layla nodded, the weight of it all settling in her bones. "Okay," she said quietly, her voice barely audible. "If that's what you want."

Bella's lips pressed into a thin line, her eyes shimmering with unshed tears. She didn't say anything, just nodded once before turning and walking away.

Layla watched her go, her chest hollow with the loss. The collision of their worlds had been brief, intense, and now it was over, leaving only the jagged edges of what could have been.

And as Bella disappeared into the night, Layla couldn't help but wonder if she would ever stop feeling the spaces between them.