A long road to happy

Chapter 23: Silliness to seriousness

Harley's POV:

“So, yeah. That's my story.” I say, glancing across the table for the first time. I don't know why I did, I knew the pity faces I'd see looking back at me.

“I told you it'd change the mood.” I pull myself from my chair, needing to be anywhere but here right now.

“I gotta. Yeah, uh, use the bathroom or something.” Sky reaches for me, but I pull my arm away, giving her a soft, gentle smile “I just need a minute, I'll be back in no time with shots. I promise.” She nods as she lets me walk off, not before whispering that she's proud of me.

As I exit the room into the hallway, I take what feels like the first breath I have taken in days. Quickly followed by the need to throw up. I run to the bathroom and throw the seat up as I just make it in time.

As I sit back against the wall, I start to second guess myself. Why did I tell them that? Why so much detail? Stupid, stupid, stupid, Harley.

I lean my head against the wall and squeeze my eyes shut tight as images flood my brain. I didn't think of the consequences of bringing that all up again. I'd buried it so deep and pretended like it wasn’t my story for so long.

My mind is trying to sort it all out, perhaps trying to shove it back into its box, but it's too late now, it's there, at the forefront of my thoughts, replaying things I haven't thought about for a long time, over and over. Random flashes of plates being thrown at me, words that cut deeper than anyone ever told me they could. Dead, vacant eyes that spark fear and dread deep in the pit of my stomach.

As my head spins, my stomach turns again. Hands guide me back to the toilet just in time.

“That's it, let it all out, sweetheart. You're OK.” My eyes are still shut tight, bit I'd know that voice anywhere, I could pick it out of a busy crowd in a heartbeat.

“I’m OK.” I repeat. I'm not really sure who I'm trying to convince. “Just too much alcohol is all.” I say. This lie is more for my sake, and I know she knows what I'm doing. I also know she'll allow me to pretend for now.

“Maybe more shots aren't a good idea? How about I make you a bloody study instead? I haven't made you one of those in a while.”

I lean back and open my eyes to take her in. “I'd like that, I'd like that a lot.” I smile.

“Why don't you wash your face and brush your teeth. I'll wait here with you.” She suggests.

I silently get up from my knees and stand in front of the sink, locking eyes with her in the mirror. “I love you, Sky. So damn much, and I appreciate you. I appreciate everything you have done, still do, and will do in the future for me. You and Danny are my people. You're both my home. I hope you know that.” With that, I start brushing my teeth.

As I spit out my toothpaste, I feel familiar arms wrapping themselves around my middle. “You don't know how much that means to me, Harley. I know you don't ‘do’ these talks, but just know you are so strong, you don't have to fight these demons on your own, you have me. You have Danny. I think you now have 2 more people.” I can feel her smirking on my shoulder. “I love you too, Har.” She finishes, her arms uncurl from around me as I feel her slap my ass. “What the?!?!” I exclaim. “You did not just do that. Sky?!” I shout as I run after her. The cheek of it!

“There will be no more drinks for you if you retaliate!” Sky squeals as I corner her in the kitchen. With a smirk on my face, I pick up the kitchen towel and start twisting it in my hand.

“No, no, Har! You're far too good at that, and it hurts! That's not fair, I only slapped your ass.”

Who are we kidding here, we both know that if she wanted to, she could make me stop. One stern look, a drop in her tone as she straightens her back. But, we both know she won't. She's doing this for me, taking my mind off of it all. I love her more for it.