Fragile Minds, Fierce Hearts

KATE

I could see the look on her face—defeated, devastated, pleading. She was practically begging for some kind of explanation about why I had a photo of Kira. I hadn't expected her to find out so quickly.

"So, you slept with me while you're married?" Chloe shouted, her voice sharp with anger and raw with hurt.

"I'm married, but she's not here," I said, the words leaving my mouth reluctantly.

"So, when you're not with her, you just sleep with other people? To fulfill what? A fantasy?"

"No," I muttered, but I could feel her fury rising like a storm.

"Then what the fuck is it?!" she yelled, her voice cracking under the weight of her emotions.

"SHE DIED." I finally snapped, the words exploding out of me. "February 12th, 2013. Car crash."

The moment the words left my mouth, I saw the change in her expression. Her anger dissolved, replaced by guilt, regret, and shame. She reached for my hand, her touch soft and tentative. "I'm so sorry, Kate. From the bottom of my heart, I mean it. You're doing great, I—"

I stupidly pulled my hand away, refusing her touch. I was filled with anger, resentment, and an overwhelming storm of emotions I couldn't explain. "Don't stress it," I said coldly, pushing her away.

"Please, accept me. Let me in. I'm not going to hurt you, ever again. Please," she begged, her voice trembling, so soft it was on the verge of breaking. I knew that desperation all too well—it was how I felt when I was splitting. When my emotions spiraled out of control, when the fear of abandonment made me say things I didn't mean, just to push people away before they could hurt me. And yet, despite that desperate part of me, there was another part that demanded I reclaim my control.

"You can never be her," I hissed, feeling the anger rise like bile in my throat, my whole body shaking with it. "Your looks, your mannerisms, your personality, your body—you will NEVER be the one. Yes, I had fun with you, but we will never be something real. I can't do that to myself. I can't do that to Kira."

I watched her fall apart in front of me, the hope draining from her eyes as quickly as it had come. It was painful, but in some twisted way, I found comfort in it. Pushing her away meant I wouldn't get hurt. Hurting her meant I didn't have to face my own pain.

"Fuck you, Kate." Her voice was cold now, distant. She pulled her hand back, her touch gone. Slowly, she stood up, clutching her belongings, biting her lip to hold back whatever emotion was threatening to spill out. "I can't believe you," she said bitterly, her voice low, before she slammed the door shut behind her.