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Do I deserve pain rather than happiness? Am I so bad that I feel sadness more than smile? Maybe that's all I feel, sadness. I never feel happy, no matter what I've done. I feel like I only feel pain that only I feel. No one understands. No one will even learn to understand it. I only have myself with the pain I have that no one can explain. I don't even know why I only get pain from anything. Do I only deserve pain.

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