Chapter 1 Never Have I Ever Been Conflicted

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The start of junior year found Devi sitting on her dorm bed at Princeton, staring at her laptop. The campus was buzzing with the excitement of new beginnings, but Devi's thoughts were elsewhere. Ben, at Columbia, had sent her a message earlier, and the familiar nerves in her stomach hadn't gone away since she read it.

Can we talk tonight? There's something on my mind.

Devi had been excited to dive into junior year, with renewed focus on her studies and a fresh start after a tumultuous sophomore year. But the message from Ben made her uneasy. He hadn't mentioned Maya in weeks, but Devi knew her persistence wasn't something that had simply disappeared.

With a sigh, she sent Ben a quick reply confirming that they could FaceTime later. She needed to know what was going on between him and Maya.

Later that evening, Devi sat at her desk, her phone propped up against a textbook. The Princeton dorm room was quiet as her roommate Maddie was out with friends, giving her the space she needed for the call. The familiar ringtone broke the silence, and when Ben's face appeared on the screen, Devi could see the conflict in his eyes.

"Hey," she said, forcing a smile. "How's Columbia treating you?"

"Busy, as always," Ben replied, running a hand through his hair. "Classes are brutal already, but, uh... there's something else I've been wanting to talk to you about."

Devi's heart sank. "Is it about Maya?"

Ben nodded, clearly uncomfortable. "She's... well, she's been around a lot. We're in a couple of the same classes, and she's been wanting to hang out all the time."

Devi clenched her jaw, trying to stay calm. "And? Are you... hanging out with her?"

"I mean, yeah, but it's just as friends. She's been pretty flirty, though, and it's making things weird," Ben admitted, looking at Devi through the screen. "I don't want you to get the wrong idea."

"I'm trying not to," Devi said, her voice tight. "But you need to set some boundaries with her, Ben. It's not fair to either of us if she thinks she has a chance with you."

"I know," Ben said, sighing. "I just don't want to hurt her feelings. She's a good person, but you're right. I need to be clear."

Devi's frustration bubbled up, but she kept her voice measured. "Look, I trust you. But this whole thing with Maya is making me feel like I'm always competing for your attention."

Ben's expression softened. "You're not, Devi. You're my priority. I'll talk to her, I promise."

Devi nodded, though the uneasy feeling in her gut didn't go away. "Okay. Let's just... keep being honest with each other."

"Agreed," Ben said, giving her a small smile. "I hate that this is even a thing between us."

Before they could dive deeper into the conversation, a knock on Devi's door interrupted them. Maddie stuck her head in, mouthing "sorry" as she waved and stepped back out, clearly not wanting to intrude.

Devi sighed, realizing they wouldn't have time to resolve everything tonight. "I've gotta go. We'll talk more later?"

"Yeah," Ben agreed. "I'll text you after I talk to Maya. I love you, Devi."

"Love you too," she replied, though her heart felt heavy as the call ended.

The next day, Devi tried to throw herself into her classes at Princeton. But her mind kept drifting back to the situation with Ben. She wondered how things were going at Columbia—if Ben had already spoken to Maya, or if he was avoiding it, hoping things would just resolve themselves.

That evening, Devi decided to call Eleanor and Fabiola to take her mind off things. They were both across the country at different schools, but FaceTiming had become their go-to way of staying connected. As the phone rang, Devi wondered what they had been up to.

Eleanor answered first, her face lighting up on the screen. "Hey, Devi! How's it going at Princeton?"

Fabiola joined moments later, adjusting her glasses. "Hey, Devi! What's up?"

Devi smiled, feeling a little more at ease hearing their voices. "I'm good, I guess. But things with Ben are complicated, as usual."

Eleanor's eyes widened. "Uh-oh, what's the drama now?"

Devi filled them in on the situation with Maya, watching as Eleanor shook her head in disbelief.

"Ben needs to handle that ASAP," Eleanor said. "I mean, I get that Maya's nice, but if she's crossing boundaries, he has to shut that down."

"I told him that," Devi replied, frustration seeping into her voice. "But I feel like this is going to keep being an issue."

Fabiola chimed in. "You've got to focus on yourself, Devi. If Ben's committed to you, he'll figure it out. Don't let this take over your whole year."

Devi nodded, appreciating the support. "Thanks, Fab. How are you guys doing?"

Eleanor grinned, clearly eager to share her news. "I got cast in a lead role in this student production! It's going to be amazing, Devi. You should come visit and see it when it's ready."

"That's awesome, Eleanor!" Devi exclaimed. "I'll definitely try to make it."

Fabiola, meanwhile, was more subdued. "I've been super busy with my AI project. We're entering a national competition, and the pressure is insane. But, hey, it's what I signed up for."

Devi smiled. "I'm proud of you both. You're killing it out there."

As the conversation turned to lighter topics, Devi felt a sense of normalcy return, even if the situation with Ben was unresolved. Her friends grounded her, reminding her that she wasn't alone in dealing with the chaos of college life.

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