That night we had an argument, when we were outside. He dug the motorcycle key into my pubic bone. He glared at me and said '' I will show what I can do after we go home".
We came home. While he was parking the motorcycle, I quickly went inside the house. My heart was pounding and I was out of breath. I was sweating vigorously. We had no lift so I had to climb to 5 floors by stairs. I didn't know how I came up but I wanted to go inside before him.
At the time I was living with my in-laws. I opened my mother in law's room and kneel down in front of her. She was sorting some documents. Maybe trying to find something. I wanted to tell her everything. I wanted to let her know what was going to happen to me. If only she knew. She smiled at me and said what she was searching for. I gave her back a sweet smile.
Not long after that my husband came upstairs. He reeked of cigarettes. He asked me what I was doing in his mother's room and called me back to our bedroom. He locked the door once I was inside. He sat quietly on the bed.
I changed my clothes into a t-shirt and shorts. He snatched my t-shirt from my body and tore my shorts, while saying a characterless person like me doesn't deserve to be clothed. He took me to the toilet. He sat in the toilet seat while taking a shit and smoking three cigarettes together. He blew the smoke on my face.
I kneel down on the wet floor of the toilet and begged him not to do anything to me . He took one of the cigarettes and burned my thighs with it, saying that I should always remember this day . He burned me three times with the cigarette butt. I kept weeping my eyes out, but I was not allowed to cry loudly.
Once he was done, he washed himself and he put me under the shower as water rained on me .He left the toilet threatening me not to come out unless he says. I stood there crying at my luck.
He came back after an hour or so , by then I was shaking and shivering with the unforgiving cold . I had already stopped crying and I felt numb. He mocked me saying why I was still there.
He took a towel and gently dried the water off me. He made me sit on the bed and dried and combed my hair gently. I cried on his shoulder like he was some sort of saviour. He acted like he was not the one who did this to me. He acted like he was saving me. But from who ? I felt helpless. He acted like the moments before this didn't exist. Like it's not a big deal. I wondered if I was just overreacting or if it wasn't that much of a big deal. Was the monster I saw a moment ago just my imagination?
-End-
