Chapter 4

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by takemetothe_lakes

by takemetothe_lakes

Peter Purdue

I love Kendall. Steve is only my best platonic bro. But Kendall is so pretty and kind and I really want her to marry me and then divorce me and then marry me all over again. Maybe.

Steve's so cool though. Like, during class, for once I was having a hard time with the subject matter because it was so easy that I couldn't even comprehend the easiness of the work. But luckily, he was able to make it sound super advanced so I was able to comprehend it once again easily.

He's also really funny. And also kind of cute. No homo. I'm not gay. Obviously.

He has the same dimples as me, which is why I think he's super cute. No homo. I just think it's nice that we both have the same features, it lets us connect on a further level, to be honest.

During lunch, I decided to sit away from him this time so I was closer to Kendall. Hopefully, by moving closer to her, she'd notice my good looks and intelligent expression as we ate. However, to my dismay, she didn't pay any attention to me. She just kept talking with her friends Bethany and Surina. And some other girl that looked more like a nobody to me. But that's beside the point.

What I'm getting at is that Kendall never notices me, it's always Steve. It's a little scary, he kept staring at me thoughtfully during lunch, looking like he was in deep thought. I tried my best to ignore the nagging feeling in my stomach due to his stare. It was like butterflies, or like the feeling I get when Kendall looks at me. I'm not gay though. Obviously. So, why am I feeling this way and acting so giddy when I'm around him?

Out of nowhere, I hear laughter emanating from Steve's table. He seems to be the center of it, with the majority of the boys being the ones laughing and three girls giggling amongst themselves. I think I hear the shortest one of them say "Write that down, write that down!" and the other two snickering and nodding enthusiastically.

I sigh, giving into the temptation of walking over and sitting closer to Steve. He immediately brightens up upon my arrival, a smile gracing his features. I can't help but reciprocate his warm smile as I begin to eat the disgusting school lunch. No, I still haven't gotten used to it. No, I'll never get used to it. Yes, I will continue to eat it for the rest of the year.

Someone throws a banana at Steve. How rude. But then, he does something crazy. He starts massaging it intensely and wiggling it, all while staring at me. I don't think he realizes the connotation of his actions until Ben and some of the other kids begin to laugh at him and start screaming "Stop!!" "Stop wiggling the banana!" "Steve, put the banana down," among other phrases.

I smile at the ridiculousness of it all. The fact that this is my life. My crush doesn't notice me at all, she doesn't even know I exist. My best-friend-forever acts weirder around me than he used to. It's probably just because he's maturing and doesn't know how else to act around me or other people.

I spot the kid at the end of the table staring at me and Steve. I wouldn't suspect him to be like the Gossippy Girls sitting beside me, but you never know. Perhaps he's not even staring at us, maybe he's staring at them.

My suspicion is confirmed when one of the girls - a brunette wearing a black fleece - comes up to his side and whispers something in his ear. I hear Steve's name being muttered, but perhaps I'm imagining it. He whispers something back and then hands her a tray of sushi, perhaps mistakenly. She looks surprised but accepts it nonetheless, thanking him a few times.

So, I decide to drop it in favor of striking up a conversation with my best-friend-forever next to me. I don't even know what we're talking about, but the big smile on his face that I engaged in a simple, meaningless conversation is priceless. I take a picture in my mind of this scene, forever to remember it when I have bad days. Before we know it, Mr. Seitman is clapping at us in an attempt to get us to line up.

We, unlike our classmates, are the first people to line up. This lets us continue our conversation without another student intruding on it. He's in the middle of his sentence when I spot Kendall, looking flawless as ever. He notices me staring at her and trying to move ever so slightly closer to her, drawn to her aura.

"I'm gonna- I've got to go do something," I tell him feverishly. He nods in understanding, albeit seeming a slight bit dejected at my affection towards Kendall. Quickly so she doesn't leave, I try to strike up a conversation with her. Thankfully, she decides I'm worth her time and reciprocates after a hesitant pause.

She must love me just as much as I love her.

Steve Pie

As I'm talking with Peter about Debate Club this year, he seems a bit disconnected from our conversation, only responding with "mhm" or "yeah". I follow his gaze to notice he's staring at Kendall Knepp, who everyone knows is his crush.

He turns back to me and begins sputtering. "I'm gonna- I've got to go do something." However disappointing I feel about him abandoning me for her, I understand why he'd want to shoot his shot with her. He's loved her for so long, with such ferocity it's painful to watch his pining sometimes.

He tries to strike up a conversation with him and she obliges, though even I can see it's with great hesitation not to reject him. Is that pity in her eyes? She must feel bad for him. Or she'll just use it against him in the future - not that they have any future together. I'll make sure of it.

When I find it's clear she's leading him on, I walk towards him with the excuse "Mr. Barkley is asking us to leave," to try to get him away from her. I flash a vicious glance at Kendall, but she just snickers a little and turns back to her friends, probably laughing at Peter's great interest in her.

I feel really bad for Peter. I open my mouth to tell him about my hypothesis, but he juts in first, yapping about how he thinks his talk with Kendall went well and how she must love him so much, and that's why she never talks to him at all. I give him a half-hearted smile and return to looking straight forward, contemplating my life leading up to this point.

What have I done to myself?

Word count: 1136