The Way Things Change

The Party

I still remember the party like it happened last night, even though it's been months. That stupid party—where everything changed. If I'd stayed home, if I'd said no, maybe things would be different. Maybe Betty and I would still be together. But it's too late for that now.

The end of summer party was supposed to be fun, just another get-together before we all went back to school. It was held at Noah's house, a place where half the town's bad decisions are made. His parents are always out of town, and everyone knows that means no rules, no questions. That night, the house was packed. Every room was full, the music was too loud, and you could smell the alcohol from a mile away. I didn't even want to be there, not really, but I didn't want to be anywhere else either. That's kind of how I felt all summer—stuck.

I hadn't seen Betty in a couple of weeks. We'd started drifting apart as the summer went on, and I didn't know how to fix it. Every time I thought about calling her, texting her, something stopped me. Maybe I was scared, maybe I was stupid, maybe both. It was like this weird invisible wall had grown between us, and I had no idea how to break it down. So I did nothing, like an idiot.

And that night, while I was doing nothing, Augustine found me.

She was leaning against the kitchen counter, her wild blonde hair falling around her shoulders like she didn't care about a damn thing in the world. I remember thinking she looked so free, so alive, like the summer sun had taken over her body. Augustine, or Inez as some people called her, wasn't like the other girls. She had this confidence about her, the kind that made you feel like she knew something you didn't. When she saw me, she gave me that smile, the one that had a little bit of trouble behind it.

"James," she called out, raising her drink. "What's a guy like you doing all alone at a party like this?"

I laughed, though it felt forced. "Just... hanging out."

"Hanging out, huh?" She took a step closer, her eyes sparkling like she was amused by the idea of me standing there doing nothing. "You used to know how to have fun. What happened to that guy?"

I wanted to say something, anything, but my mind went blank. Inez had that effect on people. It wasn't that I didn't know what I wanted to say—it was that I was afraid of saying the wrong thing. But before I could figure it out, she grabbed my hand and pulled me toward the living room.

"Come on," she said, her voice teasing. "Let's dance."

I should've said no. I should've walked away. I knew I shouldn't have gone with her, but in that moment, all my problems with Betty, all the tension, just disappeared. And I let myself go with it.

The living room was packed. People were moving to the beat of some loud, bass-heavy song I didn't recognize. The air felt thick with sweat and heat, and Augustine danced like she owned the room. She twirled in front of me, pulling me into her rhythm. I tried to keep up, but my mind was racing. I wasn't thinking about Betty in that moment. I wasn't thinking about the consequences. I was just... lost.

And then, it happened.

Augustine leaned in, closer than she should have, her lips brushing against my ear. I could feel her breath against my skin, the heat from her body. Everything felt like it was spinning—too fast, too much. She whispered something—something I can't even remember now—but it didn't matter. What mattered was the moment that followed. The one where she kissed me. Right there, in the middle of the party, surrounded by people who were too drunk to care.

For a split second, I didn't push her away. I didn't stop it. I let it happen. That's the part that kills me the most. It was like time froze, and in that moment, I forgot everything. I forgot about Betty. I forgot about how much she meant to me. I forgot who I was.

But then it hit me. Hard. Like a punch in the gut.

I pulled away from Augustine, stumbling back a step. Her eyes were wide, confused, like she couldn't believe I'd stopped. But I wasn't thinking about her anymore. All I could see was Betty—her smile, the way she laughed, the way she trusted me. And in that moment, I realized how much I'd messed up.

"I—I can't," I muttered, stepping back. My heart was racing, my hands were shaking.

Augustine just shrugged, like it was no big deal. "Whatever, James. It's just a kiss."

But it wasn't just a kiss. Not to me.

I bolted out of the living room, pushing past people until I found the front door. The cool night air hit me as I stepped outside, but it didn't help. My chest was tight, and I felt like I couldn't breathe. I messed up. I messed up bad.

I wanted to call Betty right then and there. I wanted to tell her everything, to apologize, to somehow make it right. But I couldn't. How do you explain something like that? How do you tell someone you love that you kissed someone else?

I stood on Noah's front lawn, staring up at the sky, wondering how the hell I'd gotten here. The stars were scattered across the darkness, twinkling like nothing had changed. But everything had. In one stupid, impulsive moment, everything had changed.

And I had no idea how to fix it.