Since Forever

Chapter 13

I don't know what happened today. I don't know why Cam came storming out of the locker room or why we ended up at that cliff. What I do know is I've been there. I've felt the triggering effect of loss. It slams against your chest when you least expect it. Sometimes you can pinpoint the exact moment. Sometimes it's a smell or a familiar lyric to a song. Other times, there's no rhyme or reason to the hurt.

I wonder which one it was for him. Was it something he could name? Is it always the same? Does it happen often? As often as it does for me?

"I'm failing chemistry," he says as he pulls into my driveway.

My eyes fly over to his, a quiet break laced within the emerald glow. "What?"

He runs a hand through his hair, the cords of muscle dance along his forearm before he's dropping it to his lap with a heavy exhale. "Mr. Wright sat me down a few weeks ago. Told me I wasn't exactly off to the best start. Today, Coach gave me the same lecture. Said if I don't turn it around he's going to tell my uncle."

"Cam, if you fail..."

"I can kiss the beginning of the season goodbye, not to mention any scholarship worth taking. I know."

"Okay. So, what are you going to do?"

"Study harder. Take better notes. I don't know, Kenze. I really don't. If I did, I wouldn't be in this position. All I know is I can't fail this class."

The look of helpless hope trickles across his eyes. I believe him when he says he doesn't know what else to do. A few weeks ago, I might have questioned how much effort he's actually put into the class, and I probably would have chalked up his failing grade to choosing parties and girls over studying. But there's something behind that gaze of his, something telling me he hasn't been neglecting this class, and yet, he's still struggling.

"I can help," I blurt out.

The gentle pull of his brows has me shifting to face him. "You want to help me?" he asks.

"Cam, of course I want to help. Besides, we have class together so I know what's been covered. I can help you study the right material. Whatever it is, we're going to figure this out. Failing isn't an option."

"You're seriously going to give up your limited free time to help me study?"

"Aren't you doing the same in being my fake boyfriend?"

He's quiet, those beautiful eyes of his studying me. "Okay. Yeah, I honestly don't know what to do at this point. If you think you can help, I'm down."

"Perfect. Let's go."

"Wait. Like, right now?"

"Yes, right now. Mr. Farris loves his pop quizzes. There's no time to waste."

He doesn't hesitate, grabbing his backpack and following me inside. We spend the next hour going through my notes and clarifying concepts he's been misinterpreting. He's actually not that far off. With some more help, I think he'll be back on track in no time.

When the subtle growl of my stomach rumbles between us, we move our study materials to the kitchen. Cam's sitting at the counter, his book open in front of him as I place an even layer of chips across a large plate. I turn, reaching for the cheese from the fridge and sprinkling it generously across the top. After adding another layer of chips and cheese, I pop it in the microwave.

"You know," he says, turning the page and dropping his pencil in the fold of his book. I pull the nachos from the microwave, topping it with a handful of jalapeños as I slide it between us both. "I still remember you making these almost everyday during the summer."