It's autumn when I see you in church
You just moved here with your family
As the pastor speaks, our eyes meet
Your eyes glisten
They're beautiful
•••
I want to get to know you
You're the kind of person even the evil
does not want to harm
There's just something about you, something special
A warmth that makes even strangers
feel welcome in your presence
It's beautiful
•••
I catch you after the pastors preach
"How are you finding your new surroundings?"
"Everything is quite different. But I'm ready
to embrace the changes"
I admire your bravery, your enthusiasm
You're beautiful
••••••••••
It's winter, and it's cold
But it's not when your hand finds mine
As we walk in the virgin snow at night
You look at me, and your eyes tell me
it's only to keep us warm
My heart still grows heavy
•••
It's winter, and it's cold
If it wasn't for you, I think everyone
in the village would die
Freeze to death
Your eyes light up the streets, your smile heals the weak
Your warmth spreads like fire, and it heats up every home
•••
It's winter, and you're bold
When you kiss me in the cold
But it's warm in your embrace, and it burns my heart
out of my chest
My heart falls to the ground, and the snow swallows it whole
My heart is being buried in the snow when I speak
the sentence I wish I could untell
"You can't love a woman. You're going to hell"
••••••••••
It's spring, the season of growth
And I despise it
There are no flowers, no fruits, no green leaves
Nothing grows
Only the hole in my chest
where my heart used to be
•••
It's spring, the season of changes
When I first met you,
you said you were ready
to embrace them
But you lied
The church bells don't
Nor does the coffin where you peacefully lie
••••••••••
It isn't summer
Your warmth is gone
Your blue eyes are gone, and with them
vanished the blue sky
It isn't summer at all, but it is too late
When autumn returns and I fall for you
•••
Maybe I already fell for you
Maybe I already loved you when you loved me
Maybe I didn't
Maybe I didn't realize it
Maybe I wasn't ready
Maybe I was
Maybe if I wasn't chained by a religion I would have been
Maybe if loving you wasn't a sin
Maybe then you wouldn't have been found,
your feet hovering close to the ground
Maybe then you wouldn't have realized
that a life where love had limits
wasn't worth living
••••••••••
It's winter, it's so, so cold
I'm freezing to death
Your eyes lit up my heart, your smile healed my scars
Your warmth was the fire my existence grew to feed upon, you were my home
•••
It's winter, it's cold, and you die without a home
