A Month's Contract

5. Tequila

Reet

When life gives you lemons, you toss them into tequila and drink it down. That's what I did. I stood at the counter in Ems' House, watching the bartender pour a shot, feeling a rush of bravado as I lifted the glass to my lips.

~****~

Drinking tequila after a decade? Not my brightest idea. I soon found myself vomiting in the parking lot, each wave of nausea dragging up grief I thought I'd buried deep. I couldn't stop it; tears spilled from my eyes, a raw release I hadn't prepared for.

Was I not enough? Was I too wrapped up in my own world? Did I not love her enough?

I longed to reach out to her, to feel her warmth, to hear her say she was still there. But she wasn't. She had cheated, and that knowledge stung more than the alcohol coursing through my veins.

I threw up again.

God, how pathetic.

Just then, a hand landed on my shoulder. I turned, half-expecting to see her, but it wasn't. 

"Vaidehi" I whispered.

~****~

Her expression was a blend of concern and compassion. "Hey," she said softly, her voice breaking through my spiral of despair. "You okay?"

I wiped my mouth with the back of my hand, a failed attempt to reclaim my dignity. "Yeah, just... life, you know?"

She raised an eyebrow, clearly unconvinced. "You don't look okay."

I managed a weak smile that never reached my eyes. "Really, I'm fine. Just... you know."

"Doesn't look like it," she replied, stepping closer, her presence anchoring me. "You don't have to pretend with me."

I swallowed hard, the lump in my throat growing heavier.

"You can tell me," she offered, handing me her handkerchief. I took it, but the words stuck in my throat, caught in the chaos of my emotions.

She helped me up, and we found a bench nearby. After a heavy silence, she spoke again.

"Sometimes we underestimate how much we can carry. It's okay to let it out."

The tears flowed freely once more, a torrent I had held back for far too long. "I'm just so tired of feeling inadequate."

"You are more than enough," she said, her hand squeezing my shoulder with a comforting warmth. "You always have been. Don't let someone else's choices define who you are."

I looked into her eyes, surprised by the sincerity shining through. "You really believe that?"

She nodded, her gaze steady and bright. "Absolutely. You deserve to feel whole."

In that moment, the weight on my chest began to lift, the shadows receding just a bit. Maybe, just maybe, I wasn't as alone as I thought.

~****~