Captain Pike's 'Assassin Boyfriend????'

Captin Pike's Boyfriend

You. No really, you?

He's Captain Christopher Pike of the USS Enterprise and you're... you.

When Discovery heard that Captain Pike's long time SO (or as he told Michael 'I have a Man, He means everything to me and I had to pull a lot of strings to bring him over from The Enterprise.")

was transferring over, they were expecting... not you.

This got told to your face multiple times, especially by Tilly, not even questioning why she was helping carry your stuff to the captain's quarters until she was back in Engineering, and she was like '...wait'

You Think Tilly's Amazing, tbh.

In the crew's defence, at no point did you or Pike ever attempt to correct them or let them know who exactly Pike's SO was.

All they knew was that you'd come over from the Enterprise, that's it.

No one's exactly sure what you do, like one moment you're working with Linus and everyone's like 'oh okay', and then the next moment you're tumbling down a Turbolift Shute because Tilly's gotten stuck in one.

Even Spock's not sure what you do. Do you know how hard it is too confuse a Vulcan?

it's actually Not that hard but now's NOT THE TIME!!!

Then people start seeing the two of you interact, usually in the form of you complaining as Pike takes your second, fourth, it's only my third if you're going by binary numbers , caffeinated drink from you in the mess hall, shooting you a smile and a comment about how he doesn't need his crew members all wired up.

And because of well, everything about you (your Red&Blonde hair, seemingly permanent bitchface, etc, etc), everyone just assumed that maybe you were a lieutenant of some sort that he felt a kinship too and was attempting to mentor through the command training program because clearly, you're an lieutenant, right?

...Right?

Oh, you're a Commander?

You being Pike's SO isn't even a remote possibility, which is weird because you would think that they would suspect something, considering you've left the CAPTAIN'S QUARTERS IN DAYLIGHT HOURS IN FRONT OF OTHER CREW MEMBERS!!

Also, you sat on Pike's lap during a party one time, but everyone thought it was because you were Really (and i mean this REALLY) drunk and nobody noticed the way his hand was resting in between your thighs and you could get away with it because ???

It's not until the one tiny explosion, in a Jeffries tube, that lands you in medbay and when the Captain hears about you getting some minor shrapnel to the chest and suddenly he's running to medbay, pale as a ghost, and suddenly people realise this isn't some weird mentor/mentee relationship but rather some weird romantic relationship.

I mean, they didn't realise something until you started getting into a very loud argument with him.

(it's not uncommon for you to argue, you like proving that you're right, so like)

Anyone passing by medbay that day saw you on the bed, yelling at him, while he stood there, hands raking through his hair, a dumb smirk on his face like he's turned on by it.

He kinda is, not going to lie.

Then Someone (Pike) yelled something about how the shrapnel was inches away from ending you, causing you to snark back "As I told you laSt night, that's an aMOUNT I'm willing to WORk with", and that's when it clicked all across the ship, OH HE'S WITH PIKE!!

The man goes into double digits let's be reasonable here.

Jett Reno's been suspicious of you two since the beginning, and it was pretty much confirmed for her one night when she ran into you with Pike pinned to the door of his ready room with your tongue shoved down his throat. But thats not her story to tell.

Which again, begs the question- you?

I mean he's Captain Christopher Pike, he's StarFleet's BoyScout

(And he only allows you to calling him that)

You can usually be found scowling in the background somewhere, clutching your beloved caffeinated drink, Brows Furrowed usually grumbling about idiots, as you diffuse yet another crisis.

You also don't like people, really.

(Autism, ADHD. Cause why wouldn't he fall for someone who need a bit of extra help with certain things)

Okay, you don't like MOST people, besides Pike, and that's... questionable most days.

Pike said something about having some trauma from childhood you still need to resolve too but idk

Also, you drink Soy sauce with your coffee, who does that?

So while you could usually be found helping out the various groups and units on the ship, the only person you really opened up to on Discovery is Pike.

How you and Pike became a couple no one, not even Pike, are not really sure.

Okay, Pike knows how but his mother raised him to be a gentleman and a gentleman doesn't discuss dirty laundry.

Unless it's with Spock and they were really drunk on Saurian Brandy and he felt so guilty about it afterward he swore Spock to secrecy.

Spock does tell it to Kirk years later because he doesn't understand why you and Pike were a thing really.

He doesn't either tbh

So it's an understatement when there's an unspoken rule formed shortly after you arrived was that no one got between you and your food.

If someone needed you for something and you happened to be eating during that moment, they could wait.

Even Pike knew not to mess with you unless it was like the entire crew/universe was about to blow (and if that was the case he'd get you to get your food to go because in Pike's words 'you BITE (😬) when you're Hangry.' and everyone's too afraid to ask him what he means by BITE(😬) )

That is until some assbutt (cause why wouldn't Pike and his 'Man' watch 'Supernatural') in engineering made Tilly cry over a minor mistake she made, and the day you hear about it, you're having lunch.

A lunch you've been talking about looking forward to for the past six weeks because Pike got his hands on some Talaxian Prishic Briskit for the crew, and it's not every day that you get Talaxian Prishic Briskit sandwiches.

Sometimes Pike will make one for you but that's only after you do that one thing in bed for him, and the last time Pike even thought about asking you to do that one thing, it gave Spock a pressure migraine that lasted an entire month.

Your dream lunch, consisting of a Cold Brew Cherry Mocha, a Talaxian Prishic Briskit sandwich on Mapa bread, a new bottle of Soy Sauce (with lemon and red pepper flakes), and a medium order of Pub Style Fries are in front of you.

The one thing that would make this day perfect is if you had someone's you know what to look forward to later but THAT'S NOT THE POINT!!!

But then Tilly comes into the mess hall, trying and failing to hide her tears right as you're pouring Soy onto you Briskit Snadwhich.

You see this and everyone else goes quiet when, with a sigh, you push your sandwich away and walk over to her, ask if she's okay, and when she tries to play it off, you ask her to take a walk with you so you can...talk.

Afterward, the crew is surprised when you start to open up with them, make jokes, and sometimes even... smile?

When asked about it, Tilly just smiles and makes a joke about how she underestimated Pike's... boyfriend? Husband? Life partner?

Again what are you?