Broken Ice

Chapter 4

Chantelle

Amber came around the corner smiling like the Cheshire Cat. She practically floated as she walked back to her desk, looking at me expectantly. I could feel her eyes boring into me as I tried unsuccessfully to ignore her.

"Seriously. Not you, too. He's just a normal person. Why didn't you look so happy after you came out of Bed 8?" I rolled my eyes at her as I finally looked up from my computer. I am not surprised. Amber is a huge hockey fan. She has been trying to convince me to go to a game with her since I started working here.

Still wearing that cheesy grin, she didn't even try to hide the awe and lilt of her voice as she spoke. "Well, first of all, he's just a normal person if that normal person happens to be a hot, professional hockey player." Amber sat down in her chair, waving her finger at me. "Second, since poor Mr. Jones in Bed 8 really likes the buffet, unfortunately, I could smell him before I saw him. It wasn't my favorite introduction."

It was true that an open package of fresh ground coffee sat next to me at the desk as a makeshift air freshener to help dissipate the smell of the after-effects of Mr. Jones' food poisoning.

"It's tough to pass up all-you-can-eat sushi." I grabbed my chest and dropped my mouth in mock indignation for Mr. Jones.

I did feel bad for our patient in Bed 8. My filter has always been a bit broken, so sometimes my words are not always suitable for public consumption.

"Amber, these are times when I think I should start a VLOG or podcast. You know, for the sake of public health and all—sort of an FYI for how NOT to find yourself in your local ED. Episode one would be to educate on the dangers of foreign bodies. Make sure if you put it in somewhere you don't want me to have to go; then you should ensure there is something to pull on when you want to get it out. I mean, tampons have a string for a reason. Also, there is a reason we don't poop on ourselves all the time. Those 'poop-shoot muscles' are strong- and they can create a sort of backdraft effect. So CAUTION... sometimes what goes in sometimes- goes way in."

Colin, one of the night nurses, comes up behind me with a gasping gag. On the other hand, Amber has tears running down her face because she is used to my antics. "What?! I think it could be like a public service announcement."

I continue my monologue as if this is an everyday conversation topic. "The next episode would caution the public that an all-you-can-eat sushi buffet is rarely ever a good idea. It's the same reason why you wouldn't eat tuna salad after it's been sitting out all day in the summer heat. You know, it's like basic science."

Colin is a sweet kid. I say kid because I swear I have socks older than him. He is a relatively new nurse and hasn't worked a ton with me, so he stares at me with an expression that says, 'What is the appropriate response here?'

"Colin," I stand up excitedly as I point towards him. "What do you think– should it be on TikTok, Instagram, or a podcast? You're a Gen Z'er. What do you think is best?"

Amber comes around the desk and grabs poor Colin's elbow. She wipes the tears from her eyes and shakes her head at me.

"Colin, don't mind Dr. Travis, she's harmless." She continues. "I mean, Dr. T, if this gig doesn't work out for you, I could definitely see you hosting your own medical podcast."

I looked from Amber to Colin, still seeing his confused expression. He's unsure how to interact with the two of us, so I decide to throw the poor guy a bone and redirect the conversation to safer territory.

"Oh well, I will save the podcast idea for now... Colin, did you need me?"

"Dr. Travis, Ms. Perez in bed 14 says her pain is starting to come back. She just got back from her scan."