Manipulated Court

The Inner Circle Dinner

The dining room was filled with the familiar sounds of the Inner Circle—laughter, conversation, and the clinking of silverware. Aeron was seated next to his father, Cassian, who was teasing Rhysand about some old tale from a battle long past. Feyre chimed in with her soft laughter, her bright eyes gleaming as she shared in the banter. It was a typical evening for the Inner Circle—warm, lively, full of life.

But Nyx couldn't bring himself to join in.

He sat there, barely touching his plate, the weight of his thoughts pressing down on him like a heavy cloak. It wasn't the usual guilt that gnawed at him—no, this was deeper. The guilt he felt over what he had done to April. The thought of her haunted him, her pain playing over and over in his mind like a curse.

His nightly escapes had become routine now. The nights he spent watching her, wondering how much of her soul he had broken, how much of her trust he had shattered. No one knew where he went, but everyone in the room could sense it—the tension radiating off him, like waves of worry that pulled the air taut.

Nyx had thought that trying to bring her memories back himself would be easier. He though his presence to her mind would be painless. His plan was to walk in, recover her memories, and then talk to her about them. Get to know her. He never wanted any harm to come her way, and never wanted things to have turned out so badly.

Why are you such a monster?

Stop, nyx, please

He shook his head and, instead of focusing on her beautiful voice, and tried to focus on the meal with his family.

Cassian's booming voice cut through the quiet, nudging Nyx from his thoughts. "You've been acting weird lately, kid. You chasing shadows, or is it some girl that's got you this broody?"

Nyx didn't respond, staring blankly at his untouched meal. A weak attempt at a joke, but no one laughed. Not even Aeron.

Across the table, Feyre's sharp eyes were locked onto her son. She wasn't fooled by his silence. She could feel his emotions as clearly as her own, and there was something heavy weighing on him.

"Nyx, what's wrong?" Feyre asked gently, her voice a soothing balm in the otherwise tense room.

For a moment, Nyx considered telling them—about April, about the mess he had created. But the thought of admitting to it, of saying out loud that he had hurt her so deeply, felt too much. The guilt twisted in his chest like a blade, and he couldn't meet his mother's eyes.

"Nothing," Nyx muttered, pushing his chair back and rising to his feet. "I just have a lot on my mind."

Cassian opened his mouth, maybe to throw in another joke, but Rhysand silenced him with a look. The tension was palpable now, hanging in the air like a storm cloud ready to burst.

"I'll be back," Nyx said, his voice quieter this time, more pained. "I just need some air."

He didn't wait for a response. He couldn't bear the looks of concern on their faces. The truth was, no amount of air would clear the suffocating weight of guilt that clung to him. He had to fix this.

As he strode out of the room, his mind raced. He knew he had to apologize to her. He had to do something, anything, to make her understand. To at least explain why he had invaded her memories, why he had hurt her so deeply. He couldn't let things stay this way.

The problem was, every time he thought about what he'd done, that moment played out in his head—the way she had screamed, the way she had crumpled from the pain of his powers digging too deep into her mind. The fear in her eyes. The way she had called him a monster.

He could still hear her fragile, broken voice begging him to leave.

Nyx clenched his fists as he winnowed away from the dinner, his heart pounding with determination. He had to make things right. He owed her that much. Maybe—just maybe—if he apologized, if he explained everything, she could find some way to forgive him.

But deep down, a voice whispered in his mind that forgiveness was too far out of reach. He had done too much damage.

His only hope was to help her recover her memories on her own. Maybe if she remembered, everything would fall into place. Maybe then, she could see the truth. That they were mates, that their bond went deeper than the lies Tamlin had fed her.

Nyx grit his teeth as he landed in front of the river house. He was determined to make her want to understand. He understood, now, that forcing her to do anything wouldn't do any good.

So he would make a plan. And do anything to help her.