The soft sound of wedding bells chimed in the background as Kirti stood in the centre of the grand living room, feeling utterly overwhelmed. She had imagined her wedding day countless times, but not like this. The heavy maroon lehenga clung to her slender frame, and the gold jewellery weighed down her neck. She could feel the curious stares of Divit’s family burning into her skin, judging every movement she made.
“I’ve never seen a bride look so... uncomfortable,” a woman’s voice whispered from behind her. Kirti clenched her jaw but kept her face composed. Just a few more hours, she thought, as she glanced at Divit, her new husband.
He stood at the far end of the room, surrounded by a group of men from his family, wearing an immaculately tailored sherwani. His dark eyes were unreadable as they briefly flicked toward her, then back to the conversation he was half-heartedly engaging in. He hadn’t said more than a handful of words to her since the ceremony.
Kirti swallowed the lump forming in her throat and focused on her breathing. This is not how it’s supposed to feel, she thought.
When the evening ceremonies finally ended, and they were led to the massive bedroom Divit’s family had prepared for them, Kirti’s heart pounded in her chest. She wasn’t naive—she knew tonight would be awkward. But the silence between them felt like a wall, too thick to break.
Divit opened the door to the room and gestured for her to step inside first. She glanced at him, searching for a trace of warmth in his expression, but found none. His face was as distant as it had been all day. She entered the room, feeling her throat tighten again.
“Do you need anything?” Divit’s voice was low but emotionless as he followed her in.
Kirti turned to face him, standing awkwardly in the middle of the room. “No... I’m fine.”
Divit nodded, unbuttoning his sherwani as he walked toward the closet. Kirti watched him, hoping for something—anything—that would give her a sign this was going to be okay.
“Divit...” she started hesitantly. “I know we don’t know each other well. But I hope, over time, we can... you know, get to know each other better.”
He stopped for a moment, his back turned to her. She could see the tension in his shoulders. Without turning, he responded, “We’ll see.” His tone was flat, detached.
Kirti’s heart sank. “We’ll see” was not the response she was hoping for. She wanted to ask more, to push him to talk to her, but something about the way he carried himself made her stop. She felt like she was intruding as if she were a stranger in his life and not his wife.
After changing into more comfortable clothes, Divit walked to the other side of the room, where a large couch was placed near the window. He tossed a pillow onto the couch and glanced at her. “I’ll sleep here tonight. You can have the bed.”
Kirti blinked in surprise. “You don’t have to do that. I mean, there’s enough space in the bed...”
Divit shook his head. “It’s fine. This is how it should be, for now.”
For now.
The finality of his words hit her like a slap. She stood frozen in place, unsure of what to say. How was she supposed to break through this cold exterior? Is this how it’s always going to be? she wondered.
The silence between them grew heavier, and Kirti finally gave in. “Alright,” she whispered, feeling the weight of the day presses down on her shoulders.
Divit lay down on the couch without another word. He turned his back to her, signalling that the conversation was over. Kirti slowly walked to the bed, sitting on the edge. She could hear the faint sound of his breathing, steady and calm. But inside, her own chest felt tight, like she couldn’t breathe properly.
This wasn’t how she had imagined her first night as a married woman—alone, with the man she barely knew, feeling like a stranger in her own marriage.
Kirti slipped under the covers, staring at the ceiling as the minutes stretched into hours. The soft ticking of the clock was the only sound in the room, each second echoing the distance between her and Divit. The coldness of the night settled into her bones, leaving her wide awake long after Divit’s breathing had deepened into the rhythm of sleep.
In the darkness, Kirti blinked back the tears threatening to fall. Tomorrow, she told herself, I’ll try again.
