Proud Machinery

CHAPTER TWENTY-FOUR

Learning that the others had decided to spy on the Blues and purposefully kept it from her had made Priya feel left-out and lonely. The feeling had come on so powerfully she'd almost committed the unpardonable sin of crying in front of Rod.

This had never happened to her before. Priya had always fit in sweetly with any group she found herself with—assigned study groups and summercamp kids and boyfriends' friends. That night, however, lying in bed in Stephanie's guest room, she realized that this was the first time fitting in had come in conflict with her principles. Once she thought of it that way, it was actually pretty impressive that she'd chosen her principles.

That sounded like a self-serving myth, but she was pretty sure it was true anyway. It made her feel better, though she was still faced with the depressing thought that if she embraced having enemies, she'd have more friends.

The next day she woke up past noon. She thought about going home—she'd have to move back before her parents returned anyway. But instead she lolled in bed watching movies on her laptop. When Connor texted, she asked him to leave her be for the day. She didn't want the reminder that he was the only one who liked her.

Two and a half movie-lengths later, someone knocked on the door.

"Connor, I told you..."

"It's not Connor," said Stephanie's muffled voice. She inched the door open and stuck her head inside. "I was worried about you. Normally you just pop up in the morning. Like a daisy."

"Thanks. For worrying, I mean. I just didn't feel like a daisy today."

"It's been really fun, having you live here. Like being in college and having a roommate. You like it here too, don't you Priya?"

"Steph, why didn't you tell me about the spying?"

"I knew it would make you upset."

"And then I'd try to stop you."

"Well yeah, that. But mostly I just didn't want you to be upset. I don't think anyone should be upset if they don't have to be."

"Then why did you agree with the spying idea in the first place?"

"If the Blues surprise us again we'll all be upset."

"That... makes sense, I guess."

Stephanie smiled. "Come on. Everyone's out back."

"I'd really rather stay here and finish watching this movie."

"Seriously, Priya. You have to come out. Can't you feel it? This is gonna be one of those good nights, when—when—" Stephanie shook her hands in the air as she tried to come up with words "—when everyone's ready at the same time."

"Ready for what?"

"For fun."

#

Priya had to admit, when she got outside, that Stephanie was right. She could "feel it." The Reds gathered in the backyard were talking and loud-laughing and there was electricity in the air (should she be using electrical metaphors these days? It seemed vaguely disloyal.) This was the sort of atmosphere she usually appreciated more than anything, a bunch of people wanting and waiting and willing to enjoy themselves. Connor grinned when he saw her.

People were doing tricks. Somersaults, backflips—with their strength, the Reds could all jump at least as high as they could on a trampoline. To get bigger reactions from the crowd, boys threw themselves higher and higher until Harry crashed to the ground, which got the biggest reaction of all, whistles and applause and stomping.