𝙇𝙡𝙤𝙮𝙙'𝙨 𝙜𝙧𝙚𝙚𝙣 𝙗𝙖𝙣𝙙𝙖𝙞𝙙𝙨

Chapter 8: Quiet Day

Lloyd rolls over. He's wrapped in his bedsheets. His pacifier is sitting across his pillow. Yawning, he sits up. It's silent, completely. Strange considering what it's often like. Lloyd slips out of bed and cracks his window open, cool morning air drifting in and grounding him.
He wanders into the control room to find Pixal fixing one of the electrical panels. Her silver hair is tied precisely into a bun, and indigo bird earrings dangle from her ears. She places the screwdriver on the floor, her eyes finding Lloyd in the doorway. “Hello, Lloyd. Can I help you?” She asks. He shrugs at her, gazing around the room.
  “Pix, where is everyone else?” He tries to sound nonchalant about it despite feeling sort of left out. Pixal clicks her tongue, and leans back.
“An emergency call came in from the police station, so they headed out. I'm sure they'll be back in a few hours.” She says. “I'm surprised you didn't go with them, are you feeling alright?” She gives him a very subtle tilt of the head. So he has been left out. Great. That makes him feel so wonderful about himself. He's meant to be the leader and yet they've abandoned him and gone off on their own. Lloyd wrings his hands.

“Yeah, I'm fine.” He mutters, struggling to keep the malice out of his voice. “What about master Wu?” Pixal returns her attention to the control panel.
  “He went to pick out another teapot. I think he went to one of the cute little shops on the fringe of the city.” She says. Lloyd's nose wrinkles. He really is alone. Well, Pixal is here, but she's constantly preoccupied with projects, and doesn't see much use in small talk; when you speak to her, you better have a damn important thing to say.
With nothing to do, Lloyd gets dressed in his work out clothes, and eats breakfast. And because nobody is around to judge him too harshly, he brings Bamboo onto the outside deck of the bounty. It's anchored, and sitting on the ground right outside of the city. He places Bamboo on the floor, and goes through his usual work out routine. He practices his kicks, and punches, and the rest of his spinjitsu.

As he's punching the air, perfecting his stance and form, he begins to think over last night's events. That thing Cole had said when he took him to bed. He said he was sorry. It's funny, because what Kai had said was worse, and yet he didn't give Lloyd an apology. Yes, just so funny. He should expect it from Kai by now, but doesn't he see how upset he's made Lloyd? It hurt, and it might be why he's been regressing more than usual. Lloyd shoots his fist with a little too much force and topples over onto his stomach. All the wind knocks out of him. This day already sucks.

Without much else to do, Lloyd works out all morning. It's lunchtime, when the rest of the team return, except from master Wu, apparently swept up with a bit of window shopping. Lloyd slices the avocado in half, and spoons out the seed as Jay twirls inside.
“Hey, Lloyd!” He grins, prancing past the boy as Nya follows, taking off her gloves. She runs her hand over his back as she passes. And mouths “You alright?” at him. Lloyd shrugs, giving her a mildly forceful smile. Nya is such a good person that it sort of hurts. She nods and follows Jay out of the kitchen. Lloyd spreads the green innards of the avocado on a slice of toast. Cole rocks over, swinging open the fridge and retrieving a plate of clingfilmed leftovers. Zane makes a passing comment about the mission being easy and how Lloyd didn't miss anything exciting. It's hard not to retort like an indignant little kid, but Lloyd hates it - he hates feeling so fragile in everybody's eyes. He hates being left behind.

Kai hovers in the doorway, silent, until everyone leaves. Lloyd picks up his plate of toast and turns around, the sight of his brother making him jump. Oh, are they going to have that conversation? Kai lets out a sigh, and meanders over. He pulls out a chair from the kitchen table, and sits down like he's tied with weights. He looks handsome in his uniform. His spiked hair, all wild and rebellious, slicked into style with gel. “Lloyd,” He starts. “Sit down for a minute.” He speaks gently but the boy's stomach turns nonetheless. He pulls out a chair, and sits, placing his plate down in front of him. His appetite is waning.
“I have a feeling that you heard some things I said about you a while ago, is that true?” Kai asks. Getting straight to the point, huh? Lloyd passively nods, unable to meet Kai’s gaze. “I don't remember exactly what silly thing I said, but it was about your regression habits I think.” He says. His words come out slowly as if he's been thinking this over in his head. Lloyd's hands are in his lap - he's rubbing them together, and looking at nothing. Kai clears his throat. “I was feeling a bit frustrated at the time, but I was also, am also, feeling concerned, Lloyd. Concerned about you.” He continues.

“I know that you can't always control when you get all childish and tiny, and it makes me,” Kai draws air through his grit teeth, and when Lloyd peers up at him, his brow is furrowed. “It makes me scared about what might happen to you, if you regress during a fight. You know how much I care about Nya, and I know we're not blood brothers, but fuck, dude…” Kai mutters, his hand caressing his forehead, as the words tangle in his throat. “It'd kill me if anything happened to you. I couldn't take it. It'd hurt even more if I knew you were in the headspace of a five year old when it happened.” His voice breaks, and his eyes glitter. Are those tears that he's holding in? Lloyd brushes his hair back. His anger, after such a while, has dissipated. People care about him a whole lot, it seems - maybe too much.
“I'm sorry if I made you feel crappy. I'm sorry. I never think my words through properly.” Kai finishes, rising from the table. He looks as if he wants to pat his brother's head, yet refrain and walks past him. Until Lloyd stands up.

“It's okay.” Lloyd blurts, grabbing Kai’s wrist. “You say dumb stuff all the time.” He smiles slightly. Kai turns around, raising an eyebrow. “It hurt, but… You're worried. I was afraid you didn't love me anymore because of my regression struggles.” Lloyd states, giving a weak chuckle. It's still difficult to own up to his behaviour as regression, but it's getting easier. Kai steps closer, and draws Lloyd against his chest. His little brother melts against him. Kai is special, and important, and cool, and all the things. Lloyd squeezes him tight, and for once, his happiness lures childish qualities out of him.
“That I wouldn't love you anymore?” Kai repeats in confusion. He chases his hand through the boy's blonde hair. “Dude, you're silly. Of course I love you.” He says. His voice hums out like a lullaby, and he holds Lloyd against him, even as the boy draws his thumb to his lip. Kai sighs, his guilt only now beginning to ease. He reaches for the plate of avocado toast. “Come on, you've got some lunch to eat. You need it so you can get big and strong like Cole.” He teases. Lloyd breaks away from him and nods, giggling. He's going to be the strongest ninja ever.

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A/N: this took damn near forever I'm so sorry haha my motivation for fics jus went out the window :(!! But here's a new chapter for yall :3