Church boy | Haobin

4

The days went slowly, the nights went too fast. Zhang Hao hate the day when he has to hide himself, and be fake.

But the nights—those hours after everyone else had fallen asleep—were a different story. That's when Hanbin appeared, like a secret the world had gifted only to him.

It had started the night after the club, when Zhang Hao had been lying in bed, staring at the ceiling, replaying the memory of Hanbin's smile and his challenging words about freedom. His phone had buzzed with a text that simply said:

Park, midnight?

Zhang Hao had stared at the screen for what felt like hours, nerves twisting in his stomach. But the thought of staying home, trapped under his father's rules, under Jesus rules.. was unbearable. So he had quietly climbed out of his window, walked through the stillness of the night, and found Hanbin waiting for him at the park.

That first meeting had been awkward at first, neither of them really knowing what to say or do. They had sat on the swings, gently rocking back and forth, Hanbin smoking a cigarette as Zhang Hao tried to figure out what to say. The smell of the smoke had bothered him at first, acrid and heavy, but he hadn't said anything.

"Why do you smoke?" Zhang Hao had asked suddenly, breaking the silence.

Hanbin had glanced at him, taking a slow drag before exhaling the smoke into the cool night air. "Why does anyone do anything?"

Zhang Hao frowned. "That's not an answer."

Hanbin shrugged, flicking the ash off the cigarette. "It calms me down, I guess. Life's messy, you know? Sometimes you just need something to take the edge off."

Zhang Hao had nodded, though he didn't really understand. His life had been carefully controlled for as long as he could remember. Smoking, drinking, acting recklessly—those were things that existed outside the world he knew. But Hanbin was different, untamed in a way that both scared and fascinated him.

They hadn't talked much more that night, just sat in comfortable silence until Zhang Hao had to sneak back home before his family woke up. But something had shifted between them during those quiet moments. It was like they had reached an unspoken agreement—these nights were theirs, a time to escape from everything else, to be whoever they wanted to be.

——

The other night, they met at the park again, but this time Hanbin brought a couple of beers, shoving one into Zhang Hao's hand with a smirk.

"I know you've never tried this before," Hanbin said, his eyes gleaming in the dim light. "But you should. Just once. It's not like your dad will ever find out."

Zhang Hao hesitated, staring at the can. He could practically hear his father's voice in his head, scolding him, reminding him of all the rules he had to follow. But then he looked at Hanbin, at the way he was watching him, challenging him. There was something about Hanbin's confidence that made Zhang Hao want to push against the boundaries he had lived in for so long.

"Okay," Zhang Hao said, cracking the can open. The smell hit him first—sharp and sour. He took a tentative sip and immediately winced at the bitter taste.

Hanbin laughed. "Yeah, it's gross at first. But you get used to it."

"I don't think I want to get used to it," Zhang Hao muttered, setting the can down on the bench beside him.

They sat there, the night stretching out around them, the sounds of the city fading into the background as they talked. Hanbin told stories about the people he knew, about the wild nights at the club, the friends who had come and gone. Zhang Hao listened, fascinated by this world that was so different from his own.