dimples, james "sawyer" ford

thirty seven

sawyer walked back to the beach camp in a haze, his mind still swirling from everything that had happened at the black rock. he had killed the man who ruined his life, but instead of feeling victorious or relieved, there was only an unsettling emptiness.

he gripped the cassette player locke had given him tightly, knowing he needed to deal with the new threat of juliet being a mole, but the weight of it all was too much.

as he neared the camp, he spotted lana in the food tent, her expression worried as she looked up when she spotted him. she rushed over, her eyes searching his face.

"where've you been? you okay?" she said, reaching out to touch his arm.

"i'm fine," sawyer muttered, pulling away from her touch. his tone was colder than he intended, but he couldn't shake the storm inside him. he needed space, time to process. "just... don't right now."

lana's face fell, her hand hovering in the air for a moment before she slowly lowered it. "talk to me."

"i said i'm fine," he snapped, his voice harsh, though his heart ached seeing the hurt in her eyes. but he couldn't deal with this, not now. "i gotta take care of somethin'."

without another word, he turned and walked away, leaving lana standing there, stunned and hurt. he knew he was pushing her away, but he couldn't help it. the guilt, the anger, the confusion—they were all too much.

later that night, the survivors gathered around the fire, tension thick in the air. sayid stood in front of the group, his voice steady but laced with suspicion as he spoke about naomi, the woman who had parachuted onto the island, and oceanic flight 815 being declared lost with no survivors.

"i don't trust jack and juliet," sayid announced to the group. "and i don't think any of you should either."

sawyer, standing on the edge of the group, felt his own anger flare up again. he stepped forward, holding up the cassette player. "you wanna know why we shouldn't trust 'em?" he looked around at the group, his eyes locking with lana's for a brief moment before shifting to sayid. "i got proof."

he pressed play.and the survivors listened in silence as juliet's voice played through the speakers, telling details about the beach camp and the people within it. the woman spoke about sun being pregnant and her and the baby's condition, before mentioning something that hit sawyer like a punch to the gut.

"and we know that lana being pregnant is also a possibility." juliet's voice said on the tape.

the air went still. sawyer's eyes shot to lana, and their gazes met across the campfire. she looked back at him, her face pale with shock and confusion. for a moment, neither of them moved, neither of them spoke, but the weight of what had been said hung heavy between them.

sawyer's heart raced, but he couldn't process it right now. not with the danger that was closing in.

just as the tension was about to break, jack and juliet appeared at the edge of the camp. sawyer's jaw clenched, his anger bubbling to the surface as he glared at them both. he wanted to yell, to confront them, to demand answers. but he forced himself to stay silent for the moment.

juliet looked at him, then at the others, her face calm but her eyes betraying the guilt she was carrying. "it's true. ben sent me here to gather information. but you need to listen to the rest."

sawyer's hand tightened around the player, his instincts screaming to throw it into the ocean. but he knew he needed to hear it. he turned the tape over, pressed play again, and listened to ben's cold, calculated voice describe his plan to send the others to invade the beach camp in two days.

the camp erupted into chaos, people shouting, fear spreading like wildfire. sawyer stood in the middle of it all, his mind spinning. he glanced over at lana again, but she was looking down, her arms crossed as if to protect herself from the words that juliet had said.