Thoughts : Are they only mine or ......

We all live in our heads.

As the quote states "You are not what you think you are, You are not what others think you are, You are what you think others think you are."

We put others opinion and thinking above us. Their validation, appreciation and happiness determines our own worth. Unfortunately, we forget that works both ways.

I am a average person who have watched so many fantasies in movies and series that it makes me feel I am not the main character. I am neither extremely beautiful nor extraordinarily talented. My personality is a mixed bag. I can't point out anything outstanding on me myself. On contrary, if you ask people who knows me, its different. They say that I am smart, good communicator and sometimes dominating too. 

I admit that I am a people pleasure. I want everyone to like me and have good opinion of me. But at the same time, I am scared when someone relies too much on me. I fear that I might let them down, that I am not actually as good as they think I am. God knows how many times I have recalculated my own words and actions because I didn't want to look bad in front of others. 

My thoughts was always revolving around their opinion so much so that I forget myself as if I don't exist. What I am realising now is that I never questioned myself how I was feeling. I came to the terms that I can't give happiness to others while I am unhappy myself. We can force/control actions for certain time but ultimately our true self will be revealed. 

So, let's change/shift ourselves from within so everything we do is our nature, not some calculative moves.

Be nice to everyone, not because they are your boss, your best employee or your clients. Your behaviour should be showing how you are, despite the position and behaviour of other person. Expectation is the root of all our insecurities. If we start doing everything with no expectations from anyone, trust me no one can disappoint us. It's liberating. 

On other side,

We are so caught up within ourselves that it literally takes a lifetime for most of us to realise that everybody else is actually caged in themselves as well. Believe me everyone is fighting their own demon, in their own way. And while they are trying their best, it might not be the best for us. So, let's give them benefit of doubts and be a little generous with our patience and understanding.

Remember that person can think worst about you, however, If you have positive and compassionate thoughts for them, you will be at peace. We can't change anyone but ourselves. Let's try be the one good thing in someone's day that can make them believe goodness is worth a try. And remember you are doing this for yourself so smile because the person in the mirror knows everything #NOFILTER.